Shadow Life: a journal on paper
by IluthraDanar
Summary: Flynn gives Quorra a book with blank pages in it. He tells her to write her story. Starts shortly after Flynn has saved Q. Rated for all. Comments encouraged.
1. Chapter 1

**I was sad to see no fics related to Flynn and Quorra alone. Today, I see there is one at last. But I had started this, so wanted to post it as well. **

**Comments are welcome, and downright encouraged. **

**I do not own Tron or Tron Legacy.**

**Paragraph 4 is taken from the film script, so I tip my hat to the film's writers for that.**

**Shadow Life: a journal on paper**

**Cycle one**

I am writing this in increments, as Flynn tries to live what he refers to as "a normal life". We will have "days", we will sleep, eat, play, and we will hope.

I am an ISO. I am called Quorra. As Flynn explained it to me, I and my people were born from something, and nothing. We weren't written or created by Users. We just spontaneously appeared on the Grid. Even Flynn, the Creator of the Grid is unsure how we came about, or why.

All I know is Flynn is my savior. He found me after the Purge, where Clu, one of Flynn's own creations, sought out my people, and destroyed them all. If any escaped, I don't know of it. As far as we are concerned, I am the last of my kind.

Clu was relentless. Black Guards were executing ISOs in the streets. Everyone I knew disappeared. Then they came for me. So I ran. Some less sympathetic programs smuggled me out of the city, and soon had me surrounded. I prepared for the end. Then, just as everything was going dark, I felt a hand on my shoulder, and when I opened my eyes, there standing above me, was the Creator. He saved me. I guess you could say I was a rescue.

Flynn had used that term, meaning something lost that is found, and taken in as family. He refused to acknowledge his part in my being alive, until finally I was able to convince him that he indeed, had rescued me. He is such a self-effacing person, that he found it difficult to accept my perhaps, overly effusive gratitude. He said I was a miracle, and that he was only giving fate a helping hand. He said he felt my kind would have been a way to save his own world, to remake it into something wonderful. With everyone gone but me, he seems determined to keep me safe.

Most programs can't go off the Grid. That I was able to survive, even here in the Outlands, was a testament to my abilities over basic programs. Flynn told me that when he went into hiding after Clu's betrayal, he discovered that this area was practically untouchable by basics. There just wasn't enough power to support them very long. That is not an issue for me.

So here I am, in the Creator's safehouse. He is very kind to me. We don't know what will happen. I stand by helplessly as Flynn looks across the wasteland toward the city, but I suspect he is remembering. We are alone, and he says his stories of "the old days" will keep us both entertained. He is also going to teach me to play a game called "Go". I ponder all that he's told me, and I realize, I like the word 'family'. Flynn and I are family.

I close this paper journal Flynn has given me. He calls it a book. He wants me to write down anything I choose. He says it is for me alone, and that he won't read it without my permission. I tuck it into a drawer of the dresser, Flynn called it, that sits in my room. I have my own room, with my own bed and my own dresser. I'm not sure what I should do with any of them, but I'm sure Flynn will show me.

**More to come...**


	2. Chapter 2

**I do not own Tron or Tron: Legacy**

**Shadow Life: a journal on paper**

**Cycle two**

Flynn wanted me to feel at home in what he called his safehouse. Since no programs went off-Grid, he knew that we were safe here. When Clu had betrayed him, Flynn had gone into hiding, having witnessed the Purge, the eradication of my people. He had entered the Outlands, and finding a place on top of a nonworking data pile, he created a home. From this vantage point, he had an unimpaired view of the city. Nearby, Flynn had found a spring of liquid energy. He diverted some of it into a small pool that sat on the patio, I think he called it.

"Flynn, why the pool?" I asked, dipping my fingers into the cool liquid. I could feel a slight tingle as the energy covered my hand.

"Back home, people would put swimming pools in their yards for home recreation. In my case, I find it peaceful, Quorra. The Grid is so dark," he said. He smiled at me as he came to stand by the pool, looking down at the shimmering fluid. "It shines, even in this gloom."

I knew he was thinking again, and I wished he would share more with me. I'm not particularly patient.

"Quorra, I want to explain to you about where you'll be staying."

Flynn led me to the room he said would be mine. I listened as he told me the bed was for sleeping. I don't know that I've slept before. I go into safe mode, resting he calls it, to recharge. When he explained what sleeping was to Users, I decided it was too long a period of inactivity for me.

He then showed me the dresser. Opening a drawer, he said, "You can put your things in here."

"What things?" I asked. I had nothing.

"Quorra, you have something now." He pointed to the book he had given me to write in. After he closed the drawer, he took me by the arm and led me back to the large room. As I scanned it, he said to consider this my home. We were safe and secluded here.

"Thank you, Flynn," I said, standing next to him. I was in awe of him. He had saved me, and I swore I would always fight for him against anyone, even Clu.

Flynn placed a hand on my cheek and smiled at me. "We'll be ok, kiddo. Hey, I have to get dinner started."

As he walked away, something in me melted. In that instant, I had bound myself to Flynn. No matter what, his fate would be my fate.


	3. Chapter 3

**I do not own Tron or Tron Legacy.**

**Shadow Life: a journal on paper**

**Cycle 3**

Flynn is quite a cook. Actually, he says that, not me. I 've never eaten food, and as long as I have a supply of liquid energy, I'm fine. But Flynn doesn't like eating alone. He made a meal just for the two of us out of re-programmed energy. Flynn said he found a way to simulate User food out of the stuff in my world. He wondered aloud, as he created the meal, if there would be some way to do this in his world. It would end starvation, he said. I didn't ask him what that meant. I just watched him cook.

By the time he had finished, the table was laden with more food than either he or I alone could eat.

"Flynn, it's as if you're expecting others to join us," I said, as I sat down.

"You never know when we'll have guests, Quorra. Better to be prepared," he said, picking up a plate. He placed a piece of what he called chicken on my plate. Then he followed that with a fluffy white mixture he said were mashed potatoes. Added to that was a scoop of small green pellets. "They're peas, Quorra, peas. Eat them. They're good for you."

He proceeded to fill his own plate with a mixture from the various dishes. Luckily, we had a bottle of energy, from which he filled our glasses. Holding up his glass, he said, "To us, Quorra. I'm glad you're here." He smiled broadly at me.

I picked up my glass, and held it up, saying, "I'm happy to be here with you, Flynn."

We ate, and talked a little. Flynn said he made a chocolate cake for dessert. I asked him what dessert was. He answered it was the best part of the meal. "Then why don't we just have that?" He didn't know what to say except that his mom had made him eat all his dinner before he could have any dessert. "Flynn, just once, can we have the dessert first then?"

"Quorra, try the cake, and if you like it, we can do that...once."

I took a bite from the piece that Flynn had cut from the round dessert. I stopped chewing.

"Is it that bad?" Flynn asked, seeing that I had stopped eating the cake.

I finished the bite and swallowed. "No, Flynn, it's...it's so good, I couldn't believe it." I took another bigger bite, relishing the flavor as I swallowed that too. I didn't speak anymore until I had eaten the last piece on my plate. "That was so good! Can we have cake again, soon?"

Flynn looked at me strangely. "Yeah, Quorra, we'll have cake again...soon."


	4. Chapter 4

**I do not own Tron or Tron Legacy.**

**Shadow Life: a journal on paper**

**Cycle 4**

I liked watching Flynn prepare our meals, but this time, he told me to stay way from what he referred to as, his kitchen. I wondered what he was doing. I even tried peeking, but he caught me, and told me to go to my room.

I sat on my bed, confused by Flynn's attitude. But I trusted him enough to wait. I just have to be patient, I said aloud. Soon, I heard Flynn call to me. I left my bedroom to find the table set with two plates and our utensils. In the middle of the table sat a cake. I recognized it now. Round, 9.68 centimeters tall, and covered in that wonderfully sticky-sweet, chocolate coating Flynn called frosting. There was nothing else on the table, so I surmised we were eating dessert first as he had promised me earlier.

"Quorra, this is for you," he said, smiling at me.

Still, I was confused. "Flynn, you left something burning in the middle of the cake."

"That's a candle, Quorra. This is a birthday cake. Today is your first birthday. It's a human tradition," he tried to explain.

"Tradition for what?" Not all humans are Users, he'd told me. And I'm an ISO besides.

He thought a moment, then said, "When a human child is born, that day becomes important to him or her. Each year on the anniversary of that birth, family and friends celebrate."

"But Flynn, I wasn't born today. And you don't really know when I came into being." I saw at once that he felt maybe he'd done the wrong thing. I didn't want to hurt him, so I went to his side. "Thank you, Flynn. It's wonderful." I was looking at the cake, wanting a piece anyway. But what was I supposed to do with the burning candle? I looked at the cake, then I looked at Flynn.

"Blow out the candle," he encouraged, nodding at the cake.

I leaned over the cake, looked up at him, then blew, extinguishing the flickering flame. Later, he'd told me he programmed the candle to go out with a directed air current. "Now what do we do?" I asked him.

"He shook his head and laughed. "Quorra, now you can cut the cake."

"Oh, yes, I would like that!" I cut a piece for him as I had seen him do, then I cut a piece for myself. Not waiting to even sit, I was about to take a bite, when Flynn handed me a package. "What's this?" I asked, putting down my plate.

"Another tradition. It's called a birthday present. Open it."

He watched as I slowly unwrapped his present to me. Once uncovered, I saw it was another book. "You already gave me a book, Flynn." I looked it over, and opened it. Unlike the book he had given me before, this one already had words on the pages. I closed it, and ran my hand over the cover.

"It's by Jules Verne," he replied. " Journey to the Center of the Earth. I read it when I was a boy. One of my favorites. I think you'll enjoy the characters and description of an otherworldly place."

I held the book to my chest, and smiled at Flynn. "I can't wait to read it. Thank you again."

We sat down at the table and ate our cake. I touched the book's cover, tracing the words with a finger.

"Happy birthday, Quorra," Flynn said.

I smiled as I finished my cake. When I was done, I leaned back in my chair, and asked, "Flynn, when is your birthday?"

**A/N: we don't know what Jules Verne book Q had but since this one is my fave, I decided it was Journey to the Center of the Earth. :-)**


	5. Chapter 5

**I do now own Tron or Tron Legacy.**

**Shadow Life: a journal on paper.**

**Cycle 5**

I was curious about where Flynn came from. He was known as the Creator of this world, but what was his world like. So I asked him. "Flynn, tell me something that's different about your world."

He thought a moment, before replying, "I think it's the light there, Quorra."

"Light?" I asked. "Your world isn't dark like ours?"

He laughed. "Oh, no, it's very different. Everything there is lit on the outside, and not from within, like here."

I wondered about external light, not used to anything other than our own circuitry, powering us from inside. Even our structures were self-illuminating."What lights your world, Flynn?"

"A big ball of gases we call the sun," he answered.

A look of sadness came over his face. I was afraid I had said something to upset him. "Why are you sad when you talk about the sun? Do you miss it?"

Flynn lowered his head, a slight smile on his lips. He then looked up at me. "Yeah, Quorra, I miss it."

"Please tell me about the sun." I leaned forward, my chin in my palm.

"The sun is very bright. And it's warm. When you're out in it, you feel it's warmth on your skin. If it's hot enough, it can burn you or make you sweat."

"Sweat?" I wasn't familiar with that word.

He chuckled. "That's hard to explain, Quorra. But I can tell you that when it's early morning or late evening, there is nothing more beautiful that the sun. Sunrises and sunsets, we call them. Colors like you've never seen. Oranges, pinks and reds." He seemed to love this sun he spoke of.

"I wish I could see the sun and its colors," I said, sighing. "I want to know about color, Flynn. I look up here, and there's only the darkness. I'd love to see your world of light. If we find a way to get out of here, would you show me the sun of your world?"

He looked at me again, and nodded. "Yeah, Quorra, if we get of here, I'll show you the sun."

I stood and walked over to him, placing my hand on his shoulder. "Don't be sad, Flynn. I'm sure you'll see the sun again."

He nodded, saying, "I hope so, Quorra, I hope so."


	6. Chapter 6

**I do not own Tron or Tron: Legacy.**

**Shadow Life a journal on paper**

**Cycle 6**

While Flynn was occupied with his meditations, I went to my room to read the book he had given me. I opened the drawer of my dresser, and took out the volume, again touching the title words. Journey to the center of the earth. Earth must be Flynn's world, and someone would be taking a journey. I read the preface, but much of it made no sense to me. I would ask Flynn about that later. I turned to chapter one, and began reading about Professor Liedenbrock and his family. Much of the text would require Flynn's assistance for me to understand it all. But it would give me the chance to share what Flynn knew. I perused through the entire book, waiting for his help to comprehend the words.

When Flynn had finished his meditating, I ventured to ask him about his gift. "Flynn, I've started the book you gave me, but there is much I don't understand." He motioned me to sit down, so I took a place beside him on the small couch. "I've only scanned it so far, but I understand the Users in the book wanting to explore a world not their own."

"They're not Users, Quorra," Flynn stated, chuckling.

"Not Users?" I asked, puzzled.

"Humans didn't even have computers back then. Even now, not all humans are Users. But back to the story. Humans always hunger for something more, to find the dream that may be reality."

I smiled, saying "Like you!" I tucked my legs under each other as I listened to Flynn.

"Well, at first, what I found, I found by accident. But later, yeah, I worked to make my dream real."

"And so you created the Grid." I opened the book to a random page, and started to read.

"If my eyes were able to range afar over this great sea, it was because a peculiar light brought to view every detail of it. It was not the light of the sun, with his dazzling shafts of brightness and the splendour of his rays; nor was it the pale and uncertain shimmer of the moonbeams, the dim reflection of a nobler body of light. No, the illuminating power of this light, its trembling diffusiveness, its bright, clear whiteness, and its low temperature, showed that it must be of electric origin. It was like an aurora borealis, a continuous cosmical phenomenon, filling a cavern of sufficient extent to contain an ocean."

I then closed the book. "I know what the sun is. But the description doesn't indicate they were seeing the sun."

"That's right, Quorra, they had reached the center of my planet, and were describing the light within that planet. They had discovered a new world unknown to anyone."

"How exciting, Flynn! A new world. This book could be about you," I said proudly.

"Well, uh, Quorra, that book is a work of fiction. It's not real."

"What? Nothing in the book happened?" I felt a disappointment, even though I had yet to read it. "Why was it written then?" I asked.

He placed a hand on his chin as he explained. "Sometimes humans write books about something that isn't real, or is based on reality, but not wholly true. It entertains others as they read. I wanted you to read it, not only for entertainment, but to learn more about humans."

I thought a moment, then asked, "Did you write about our world, when you returned to yours?"

"Actually, I did, in a roundabout way. I didn't say I had stumbled onto the digital frontier, or anything like that, but I used it as an example of how our technology works."

What a waste of knowledge, I thought. "Hm...so humans were entertained, but looked at it as ...fiction."

"That's right," he said, nodding.

I wanted Flynn's world to know about our world. I wanted them to know the Grid was real. That **we** were real. "If I escape the Grid, I want to tell everyone what I know, and that I'm an ISO."

He reached out to clasp my hand. "Not a good idea, Quorra. Humans, even Users, don't think of programs or the Grid as real. And they certainly don't know about ISOs. When your kind made themselves known to me, I wanted to share them with my world. Now, it doesn't matter."

I placed my other hand over his. "I'm here, Flynn. And I would love to enter your world, and let them know about the ISOs, even if it is only me."

"Sure, Quorra. Someday. But for now, read the book. Study the characters and situations they get into. Learn from it." He leaned forward, and pressed his lips to my cheek. I touched the spot with my fingertips.

"It's a kiss. A sign of affection between humans." He patted my head saying, "I'm going to my room now. Good night, Quorra."

"Good night, Flynn," I said, rising from the couch when he deactivated the lights. In my room, I sat on the bed, and again started reading the book. But I decided that someday, as these people had entered a new world of discovery, I would enter Flynn's world. Humans would know of us, someday.

**A/N: the underlined words were taken from Jules Verne's Journey to the Center of the Earth. I also do not own that.**


	7. Chapter 7

**Shadow Life: a journal on paper**

**Cycle 7**

I had noticed Flynn working on one of his special projects, but he wouldn't tell me what this one was. I would query him, but he would only say it was going to be radical. I wasn't sure if this was a good thing or not.

"Flynn?"

"Yes, Quorra."

"What are you making?"

"It's a secret," he answered, his back to me.

"Can't you give me a hint, Flynn?" I asked, as I stood looking over his shoulder while he worked.

"Alright, Quorra," he said, finally giving in to my hovering presence. "We need transportation that will work off-Grid. The light cycle's fine for one of us, but this is a light runner. Bigger, more powerful," he said, showing me the schematics he'd been concentrating on so much lately. I was excited. Watching Flynn work was inspiring. I felt that no one would be as close to the Creator as I was, being able to see his creativity in action.

As I observed his calculations, I thought about what he was in his world. He would tell me he found the life of a programmer frustrating. Locked in a cubicle, as he explained it, was confining and tedious. For all his construction on a computer, his final creation would still be unseen. That would come much later. Here, his creations manifested as soon as he was finished with the plans. 'It's instant gratification, man!' he would say. I couldn't help but smile at his enthusiasm.

"Flynn?"

"Yes, Quorra," he answered, not even pausing to look at me.

"When you're done, may I drive it?"

He stopped and looked up at me. "Quorra, do you know how to drive anything but a light cycle?"

I was insulted at the implication that, if I didn't know how to drive one now, I never would be able to. "I can learn!" I said, unable to keep the irritation from my tone.

He chuckled as he went back to work. "I sometimes wonder what I got myself into when I found you."

I was taken aback. "Are you sorry you saved my life?"

"Never, Quorra, not if we were stuck here together for the next 1000 cycles."

I leaned over to kiss his cheek, as he had kissed mine earlier. He looked up at me and smiled, then went back to work.

"Flynn?" I persisted.

"Hmmm?"

"When are you going to teach me to drive?"

He stopped his calculations, and turned in his seat. He said, "Quorra, I thought that, when I became a father, I would have time to do all the things fathers do with their children, including teaching them to drive. Then I got stuck on the Grid." He squeezed my shoulder, saying, "Thank you for giving me the chance to do the dad thing."

I wasn't sure what that meant, but if it made Flynn happy, I was happy.


	8. Chapter 8

**I do not own Tron or Tron : Legacy.**

**Shadow Life: a journal on paper**

**Cycle 8**

I had heard Flynn cry out as he was resting in his room. I went to see if he was alright, knocking on the door, and entering when he didn't reply. "Flynn?" No sound. I walked to his bedside, noting that his eyes were open, staring up at the ceiling. I reached out to touch his shoulder. "Flynn?"

"I'm awake, Quorra."

"I'm sorry. I heard you call out something." Still not knowing about Users in general and the Creator specifically, I worried.

"I'm fine. It was just a dream. Go back to bed."

The order seemed irrelevant, since I did not sleep. I might lie on the bed and read, but sleep, never. I started to leave him, but curiosity got the better of me. "Who is Sam? You called out his name."

"Did I? I wasn't aware." He sighed, and sat upright on the bed. "Sam...is my son."

"Son?" I asked. So that was why he looked so sad talking about the light in his world. He wasn't missing the sun, he was missing his son.

"He's my child, Quorra."

"Oh, children. Smaller versions of yourself. Like in the book. How do you create children, Flynn? Is it similar to creating programs?" I sat on the edge of the bed at his behest.

"Not really. It's more fun, though. Humans reproduce in a way programs can't. We get married and have babies."

"How do Users make babies?"

He laughed at me, saying, "Quorra, you're such an innocent. And that is a story for another time."

Disappointed in his lack of a reply, I asked, "So Sam is your baby?

"Yes, he is. When I left, though, he was about 7 years old. Then I got stuck here. I'm afraid I'll never see him again.

"You'll find a way out someday, Flynn. You're the Creator. There's nothing you can't do.

"I hope so, Quorra." He seemed so forelorn when he spoke, I suppose like I can be, when I think about the Purge. I wanted to help him feel better, but didn't know how.

"Tell me about Sam." I tucked a leg under me and listened.

"He's a bright kid, real smart. I loved telling him stories about the old Grid, and the new one. Tron….and Clu. He wanted to come here so badly, and I would have brought him in, eventually. Now I may never get the chance to show him any of it, ever."

So that was what Flynn had meant when he said showing me how to drive the runner would be like showing his son how to drive. "Flynn. Please teach me, just as you would have taught Sam. Anything you want to share with me. But mostly...how to drive the light runner?"

"Quorra, for an ISO, you have the one track mind of a program. Alright, as soon as I finish the light runner, we'll go out for a lesson."

I smiled and hugged him. "Good night, Flynn." I started to leave his room, but turned back, saying, "I'm sure Sam thinks of you every day."

He smiled back, and nodded.

Before I returned to my room, I stepped outside the barrier and looked at the distant city. There was no longer anyone like me. There would be no one to think about me. Clu had taken all of that away. But I wasn't alone. As long as I had Flynn, I was not alone. Nor would he be alone, because he had me. I hugged myself and went back inside, wondering...how long it would be before Flynn finished the runner.


	9. Chapter 9

**I do not own Tron or Tron : Legacy.**

**Shadow Life: a journal on paper**

**Cycle 9**

"Quorra! Quorra, come here, quick!"

I took the lift down to the lower level, fearful of what I might find. The Creator wasn't one for dramatic outbursts. When I stepped off, I was met by a beaming Flynn, standing in front of the light runner.

"Look, Quorra, it's finished! Isn't she a beauty." He ran his hand along the body of the vehicle.

I went over to join him. "Flynn, it is beautiful. When can we try it out?" I checked out the interior, looking at all the buttons and levers, wondering what they were for.

I reached out to touch one, when Flynn yelled, "No, Quorra!" He stretched over the passenger door, slowly taking my hand away from the button I was just about to push. "That's a weapon. Please, don't touch anything yet. Wait for me to show you what everything is."

"When?" I asked. I had no idea he was going to add weaponry to the runner. What was he anticipating would happen if we went out for a ride? I turned, leaning against the runner. "Flynn, why weapons?"

He came to stand in front of me. "Quorra, the Grid isn't a safe place anymore. You know that, I know that. We won't be going anywhere near the city, by choice. The basic goal of any User is to be prepared. It's like the Boy Scouts." He walked around the back of the vehicle, checking it on all sides.

"Boy Scouts?" I asked.

"Never mind, Quorra. You just have to calculate all the possibilities and know that, no matter what happens, you've got everything covered." He smiled at his creation. "She's radical, my dear apprentice. She's able to run on or off the Grid. Their vehicles can't go off-Grid, which gives us an advantage."

I could tell he was so proud. I just waited for him, my hands behind my back, kicking one of my boots against the other.

"Alright, Quorra, get in," he said, pretending to be put out by my impatience. At least I think he was pretending. I started to get in the driver's side, when he pointed at me and then at the passenger seat. I frowned a bit, but then got in, excited for my first lesson. "Now, this is the steering column, these levers are pretty innocuous, extra gears, lights and the tires. Oh yeah, to go off-Grid, you have to have the tires in stud mode. That'll prevent damage to the vehicle as a whole." He continued showing me what everything was, then we left the recharging pad.

Flynn took us down the natural pathway leading from the house, showing me how to use the gears and control the vehicle's speed. When we reached the bottom of the hill, he stopped and stepped out. I looked over at him. "Come on, Quorra. You've been waiting for this. Give her a try."

I hopped out, running to where he stood. I smiled up at him when he squeezed my shoulder. Once I was behind the steering grips, I shifted the vehicle as he had shown me, turning the runner around to head back up the hill.

"Quorra, slow down!" I heard him say above the noise of the engine.

I turned to him laughing, and saw that he really looked scared. "Don't worry, Flynn. I know what I'm doing." I increased speed up the hill, and coming up on the turn, swung the steering grips a full 180 degrees, and took the corner, sliding the back wheels dangerously close to the edge of the pathway, and the drop below. "Whooohoooo! Did you see that?" I said, excited by the rush. The rest of the way was easy. Upon reaching the recharge pad, I stopped the runner and got out. "That was incredible, Flynn!" Silence. "Flynn?" I walked to the passenger side, only to find him clutching the seat, his face white. I brought up my hand to stifle a giggle, and opened the door to help him out. "I wasn't that bad. Was I?"

He gave me blank stare and proceeded to the lift. But he did wait for me. I stepped on, and we rode to the top in silence.

"Flynn?" I called to him as he went to get a glass of energy. "Flynn? Does this mean I won't get to drive the runner again?"

He finished the glass, turned to me and said, "Quorra, you amaze me. One lesson, and you'd give Mario Andretti a run for his money."

"Mario who?" I was glad to see he wasn't angry at me.

In fact, he put down the glass, and hugged me. Laughing, he said, "Quorra, any time you want to take out the runner, feel free. Just don't hit the red button, ok?" He pulled back from me, saying, "We don't need things blowing up out here, and have Clu know where we are." He patted my cheek and left me. "I'm going to lie down. You've worn me out, Q."

I lowered my head, smiling slightly at Flynn's parting words. And he'd called me Q. I felt warm all over. I couldn't even put into thoughts the feelings I had for this man, this User. Clu might have, at one time, emulated the Creator, but he would always come up wanting. Flynn had a heart and a soul. I know this from reading through some of his books. Clu was a construct, without either heart or soul. One day, I would ask Flynn what a soul was. The heart I knew. He had shown me his every day since he found and saved me.

**A/N: this one went a little longer than I'd planned. But for giving Quorra her first driving lesson, it seemed suitable. Thanks for reading!**


	10. Chapter 10

**I do not own Tron or Tron: Legacy.**

**Shadow Life: a journal on paper**

**Cycle 10**

Flynn wanted to show me how to play a simple game of strategy, one he called "Go". As he taught me to play, he would take a very long time making his moves, while I would quickly decide where to place my next piece.

"Q, you're too aggressive. You need to take your time, study the board, imagine moves far in advance of your current move."

I placed a piece next to one of his, and waited for his move.

He laughed and shook his head."Why did I expect anything else? Don't be so impatient, Quorra. Take your time. That's why it's called a game of strategy. You try to out-maneuver your opponent's moves with more strategic moves of your own."

"But Flynn, if I know what pieces I want where, why would I delay placing them on the board. That seems a waste of time."

"And time is what we have in abundance, my dear apprentice." He moved a piece across the board, not where I would have expected him to place it.

"Was that move wise, Flynn?" I asked him, my eyes shifting from the board to his face.

He merely smiled, saying 'uh huh'. I know he thinks I don't understand strategy, but I do. I have had to think about that since Clu began his usurpation of the Grid. I placed a piece, thinking I had Flynn blocked, but on his turn, he slowly stretched a hand toward me, dropping his piece down and triumphantly pronounced himself the winner yet again.

"You see, Q, look ahead. If you only see what's in the moment, you'll miss the very important things to come."

"Like you saw what was going to happen with Clu?" I immediately regretted the words as soon as I saw the look on his face. I rose from my chair and went to kneel beside him, placing my hand on his. "I'm sorry, Flynn. I had no right to say anything about Clu."

He put his free hand over mine, clasping it gently. "Quorra, you're right. I created Clu, and in my arrogance, made him something that was easily twisted and corruptible. I wanted perfection, but I see that I was wrong. Sometimes the things we look for are right in front of us." He touched my cheek.

I smiled at his touch. "It wasn't your fault. You made him too human, Flynn. And from what I have been reading in your books, humans are unpredictable."

He chuckled. "Yes, we are." He leaned forward and kissed my forehead.

I rose and squeezed his shoulder. "Shall we play again later? I promise to take your advice next time."

"My dear Quorra, you are predictable, and I know you won't change. But that's right for you. Be impatient, be impulsive. It suits you."

I cleared off the board, placing our playing pieces in our respective cups. "How about some dessert, Flynn? There's leftover cake."

"I think I've created a cake monster, Q, but yes, you can get me a piece too, if you would."

I gave him a look of pique. A monster was one thing I was not. And a cake monster? What was that supposed to mean? But I cut him a large piece, and handed it to him. My own piece was probably larger, but since he had given me the name, I may as well live up to it. Since Flynn had introduced cake to me, it had become my weakness. "Flynn, do you really think I'm a monster?"

He stopped eating his cake, set his plate on his lap, and looked at me, saying, "Quorra, you are not a monster. I was joking, meaning I was just teasing you." He sat in silence for a moment. "You have been the one bright spot in this miserable situation I find myself in. If not for you, I might have gone crazy if I had to be out here alone for much longer."

His words made me smile. "I can say the same thing about you. Being the last of my kind would mean a life of loneliness. But I have you now."

I think Flynn was embarrassed, because he didn't look at me. He just lowered his head with his eyes closed. Then he perked up suddenly, saying, "Thanks, Quorra. Now, eat your cake and we'll play another round. I might even let you win."

I pretended to be shocked. "Let me win? I'll beat you, how did you say, fair in the square?"

"That's fair and square, and bring it on, Q."

And we both laughed as we finished our cake. If it could always be this way between us, I wouldn't mind. Being alone no longer meant being lonely.


	11. Chapter 11

**I do not own Tron or Tron: Legacy.**

**Shadow Life: A journal on paper**

**Cycle 11**

Flynn decided that we should try to do something different, something "normal". I asked him what he regarded to be normal, since it could encompass many things. He told me we would go on a picnic. I knew what pick meant, and I knew what nick meant, so a pick-nick seemed like a hunt of sorts. We would pick nicks, I assumed aloud. He laughed when I asked where we would find nicks.

"Quorra, a picnic is an outing. We'll take food and a blanket, and enjoy doing nothing."

"Flynn, doing nothing isn't very productive," I pointed out.

"That's the point, Quorra. Doing nothing is restful." He picked up a carrier I had never seen before.

"What's that?" I asked, pointing at the thing in his hand.

"It's a picnic basket. I rezzed it up awhile ago." He opened it to reveal a blanket, food items and something familiar, but I wasn't sure what it was. "Where are we having our picnic, Flynn?"

As we got into the light runner, he replied, "I thought a spot by the Sea of Simulation would be nice. It's not like oceans back home, but it'll do."

We drove along a pathway leading to the Sea, where we left the runner, and removing our things, stepped over to a place where Flynn laid out the blanket. He knelt on it, taking the food items from the basket. I saw he had rezzed up fried chicken, corn cobs, and apple turnovers. Along with that, he brought a container of energy. The unknown item, he left at the bottom.

We ate while talking, Flynn telling me about his son Sam. His eyes always lit up when he spoke of Sam. I hoped someday to meet him, to see if he was like his father. We also watched the Sea waves, as we sat on the blanket. I leaned back on my arms, my legs stretched out in front of me. I think talking about his son made Flynn sad. He stood and began tossing broken data into the Sea, waiting for each splash. To try to cheer him, I pulled the last item from the basket.

"Flynn, what's this?" I asked, holding up a disk not too unlike our own identity disks. The material was very different though. And because the center was closed, one couldn't hold it with fingers locked around it.

"That, my dear apprentice, is a frisbee." He took it from my hand, turning it over, seemingly satisfied in its construction. "You play with it by tossing it to other players. It's like Disk Wars, only more benign. No one dies," he said, lowering his head.

Again, he seemed sad, so I stood and said, "Ok, show me how you play." He smiled and told me to stand away from him. He turned, and moved away even further. "Now," he shouted, holding the disk in his hand, "this is how you toss it." He curved his wrist and threw the frisbee outward, the disk leaving his hand and heading for me.

"Wait! What do I ...?" The disk landed at my feet. I stared down at it, saying, "That's it?"

"Throw it back at me," he shouted again.

I picked up the lightweight disk and threw it at Flynn. It flipped oddly and rolled somewhat away from where he was standing. He shook his head, and went to pick up the object. I held out my hands. "What?" I asked, when I heard his laughter, and wondered what was so amusing.

He stood a moment, then yelled at me to catch the frisbee. I waited for him to throw it to me. When it came close, I jumped up, grabbing the disk from the air...and fell on my butt, as Flynn called it. No matter the name, it hurt. Data is not soft for landings. I stood, rubbing my backside, but held the disk high. "I caught it!" I said loudly, smiling at my success.

"Yeah, Quorra, you did!" His smile was such, I couldn't help but run to him. He took the disk from my hand, putting an arm around me. "I think that's enough lesson for today. Let's go home."

We picked up the picnic stuff, placing it all in the basket, where, once home, Flynn would de-rezz it all into basic matter. Driving the light runner back up the hill, I said, "I think I prefer your frisbee disk game over Disk Wars. It's less deadly."

"Q, there is a lot about home that is less deadly than here on the Grid. I want you to see it someday."

I gave him a sideways glance. I knew he missed home and his son, even as I missed my friends. But dreaming of a future when we would both go to his world, it sustained us, I think. "Flynn, thank you for sharing part of your home with me. It was...fun."

He turned to me, grinning, and said only, "You're welcome." Then he went back to his own thoughts, staring ahead. I ached for him, but was determined to be there for him always. I remembered the days when the ISOs were not chased down and hunted. It was a time of peace and shared knowledge. I decided I would find a memory of my people to share with him too.


	12. Chapter 12

**I do not own Tron or Tron: Legacy.**

**Shadow Life: a journal on paper**

**Cycle 12**

I was in my room, lying on my bed reading a book, when Flynn knocked on the door. "Come in," I called out.

He opened the door, just standing there, and asked with a big grin on his face, "How did you know it was me, Quorra?"

"Is there ever anyone else?" I answered back, putting down the book.

"You never know, Q, we may have guests some day." He still had a habit of creating too much food.

I cocked my eyebrow at him. "There are no guests, Flynn." I sat up expectantly. Usually if he disturbed me, it was for a reason. "What can I do for you?"

He came further into the room, standing there, looking down at me. "I...just need to talk, Q. Do you mind?"

I sat up, crossing my legs beneath me. "Please, sit."

When he had settled on the bed, he picked up the book I had been reading. "Anna Karenina. Heavy stuff."

"I'm enjoying it. It's full of wonderful insights into the human spirit. Since you said not all humans are Users, I wanted to know what non-Users were like."

"Well, these humans are from another time, Quorra, so comparing them, say, to me or anyone from my era, may be less than accurate."

I shrugged. "It still has elements of what a human is inside, doesn't it?"

"Sure, Q. Enjoy the book, and be sure to ask me any questions you have."

I thought for a moment, wondering why he was here, and why he wanted to discuss books. Then it struck me that he might be lonely. Often times, he would be busy with his calculations on several projects he was working, and I would go out driving or stay indoors reading. It was he and I, always, just the two of us. "Flynn," I said, tilting my head to peer at him, "is there anything...wrong? You can tell me."

He looked at me with an expression I couldn't describe. Usually, he could be happily laughing, or angry as he muttered expletives. But this look conveyed no meaning to me. "It's...nothing, Q. I'm sorry if I disturbed you." He rose from the bed, and went out into the main room.

I picked up the book, reading the same paragraph 5.7 times, and gave up. Deciding that Flynn wanted to say more, I went out to join him. He was sitting in one of the chairs, his head down and eyes closed. I came up behind him, placing my hands on his shoulders. "Flynn..."

He'd raised his head at my touch. "Quorra, it's ok. I guess I'm feeling a bit out of it. Time is so extended here, but how much has passed outside? Man, I don't even want to think about it anymore."

I knew he was referring to his world, and most likely thinking of Sam. "I could calculate that for you," I offered, not realizing it was the last thing he wanted.

"Don't, Q." He patted one of my hands, squeezing it lightly. "I promised him I'd be back the next day to take him to the arcade. He...he thinks I broke my word to him. I would never..."

I slipped my arms around him, clasping my hands over his chest. "He knows, Flynn. He knows."

"How could he, Quorra? He's just a kid. I never should have come back here." He had never expressed regrets before. This surprised me, since explanations were not his forte when it came to his personal feelings.

Human emotion was something I was only familiar with in the books I had been reading. I had never felt anything akin to that. But something inside me felt broken. I lay my chin on top of his head. "He's your son, Flynn. He loves you. And I know that you'll find a way to get back to him." I felt something wet on my hand. When I leaned to the side, I saw a drop of liquid there. I released Flynn, moving to the side of the chair. I knelt next to him, looking at my hand. Touching the odd fluid, I looked at it as it sat on my skin.

"It's called a tear," he said, rubbing his face with his hands. He looked at me, his eyes glistening. I reached out to touch his cheek, just looking at the features of his face. I smiled briefly, but somehow it didn't seem appropriate. I started to rise, but he grabbed me fiercely, embracing me while burying his face in my shoulder. I closed my eyes as we held each other for what seemed like cycles.

Finally, he released me. "Thank you, Quorra."

I stood and waited.

"I guess it all hit me at once. Clu and Tron, the Grid, the ISOs...you. And my son." He turned to look out the window. Off in the distance, the city gleamed brightly. A beacon covered by a pall of darkness no light could ever touch. His home and mine, no longer.


	13. Chapter 13

**I do not own Tron or Tron Legacy.**

**Shadow Life : a journal on paper**

**Cycle 13**

We were sipping warmed energy out by the pool as I told Flynn about my people and the city we lived in. I explained that the goal of ISOs was to create beauty. We were not programmed to create perfection, as was Clu, but rather to create art, science, and other things that the Grid lacked. Flynn nodded, remembering Radia, our leader. She approved that we each bring one thing to the Grid.

"So what did you decide for yourself, Quorra?" Flynn asked.

I thought, recalling going out to the edge of the city, finding bits of data, and making a piece of decor-art. "I wasn't satisfied with it when I had finished, but Radia had declared it a wonder, and saved it from my desire to destroy it. '_This is a part of you, Quorra. An extension of your essence, and must not been done away with.' _she said. She was good and kind, a just leader, Flynn. It wasn't right that she was..." I couldn't continue.

"She was right, Q. Don't you think there have been times when I would write something that didn't seem practical after all? I might have destroyed it and started over, but instead, I rewrote it, using the basic elements from the original. In retrospect, it was usually the best way to go."

I turned my head to face him. "Do you ever regret creating Clu?"

"No, Quorra, not even with what's happened. I know there's good in him. I only wish I could get close enough to somehow re-code him. I did something wrong. You can't blame the child for the poor teachings of the parents."

Flynn acknowledged that Clu was like a child, one who was behaving badly. He had to see it was more than that. "I would be happy to see him de-rezzed, Flynn."

He reached out to clasp my free hand. "I know, Q. And I'm sorry. But you survived." He was looking at me when he said, 'A thing of beauty is a joy forever. It's loveliness increases, it will never pass into nothingness.' Keats, I think." He smiled at me and looked back to the view, taking a sip of his drink.

Later on, after Flynn had gone to bed, I snuck out of the house, taking the lift down to the lower level. I walked over large pieces of data, looking for just the right sizes. They couldn't be too big, so I had to choose carefully, the ones I felt would suit. I returned upstairs, taking my fragments with me. Setting them on the table, I arranged them one by one, sealing them together with a touch. The spot would glow and meld, two separate data pieces becoming one. I slowly molded everything to that which I was using as a model. Finally, I was done, looking over the finished product with some satisfaction. It looked better than the one Radia had admired. I took it to my room, and waited for Flynn to rise.

When he did awaken, he had gone to the kitchen to prepare our breakfast. I waited for him at the table, my gift sitting at his chair. He came in, holding a tray, laden with food. He set the tray down, and noticed my gift. Flynn looked at me and then the gift. I smiled at him, nodding. "It's for you."

Flynn picked up the small sculpture. "It's a rose, Quorra. It's...beautiful! You made this?"

"Yes, from fragments of data outside. I found a picture in one of your books " He could tell what it was, so I must have done something right. "There were several flowers to chose from. I liked that one best."

"So you had made a flower before? But Quorra, there are no flowers on the Grid."

"It wasn't a flower really, not like your flowers. You do like it."

He hugged me, saying, "Yes, I like it very much. You're quite talented, Q." He kissed my forehead, and placed the flower beside his cup of coffee. "Thank you."

I was finally able to give a gift to Flynn. He had already given me so much. We ate our breakfast, talking about adding some more creations to the place. I laughed inside as the ever curious Flynn asked me how I had done it. He was the Creator, but this was something he didn't know how to do. And inside, I felt as if I would burst with happiness.


	14. Chapter 14

**I do not own Tron or Tron: Legacy.**

**Shadow Life: a journal on paper**

**Cycle 14**

A great deal of our time was spent learning about the Outlands. Although Flynn was the Creator, he had little knowledge on what the area was like, if anything existed out here, and whether or not we were in danger from Clu. He felt we should be shielded from any possible threat, so Flynn set about creating a way to make us invisible to visual and spacial cues. Grid bugs were also a consideration. but even they seemed to stay away from the Outlands, needing energy as much as any program.

"Is it almost ready?" I asked him, as he tinkered, he liked to call it tinkering when he was building something new, with the shielding unit. It was hidden within the wall, since he didn't want anyone to disable it, should we be out. Always thinking of the possibilities. I suppose it had to do with his boy scouts being prepared.

"Just about, Q. What I'll need you to do is take the runner out as close to the city as you can get, WITHOUT getting caught. Do you understand? Don't take any risks!"

All I heard was 'take the runner out'. He was letting me go that far, alone. I smiled, as I nodded at his instructions. He wanted me to see if our location gave off any wave particles, and if the shield blocked those particles. Even if all was clear, Flynn indicated Clu might find a way to detect us all the way out here.

I took the runner and headed toward the city. The darkness permeated everything, making the city the best guidepost on the Grid. When I felt I was far enough from our house, I stopped, using a basic particle detector Flynn had pieced together. He always amazed me with how easily he could create standard equipment, yet was also into studying how his User nature might affect the Grid, or vice versa.

From here, I could see the hill our house sat upon. Visual cues were good. I aimed the particle detector in that direction, and noticed nothing that would stand out. We were effectively shielded from detection by anyone in the city.

I headed back to the house to let Flynn know the good news. His shield worked. When I arrived, I noticed the light grid that separated us from the outside. "Is that it?" I asked him, walking up to the grid and reaching out to touch it.

"Quorra, you can walk through it. So can I. Anything else will be stopped, including Grid bugs and particle wave detectors. As far as anyone noticing us, we are essentually invisible." He waved his hands in an odd way. Seeing my frown, he explained, "I was being spooky, Q."

"Spooky? What does 'spooky' mean?" I cocked an eyebrow at him, as he would often lace his speech with words foreign to me. I only recently understood what he meant when he would call me 'dude', and anything else 'radical'.

"Spooky, Q, means scary, like ooooooo, you know, ghost-like." Once more, he waved his hands about.

I frowned again. "Ghost-like. What is a ghost?" I asked.

He thought for a moment, then said, "Ghosts are supposed to be remnants of humans, what's left when the human dies. His spirit, or, as some believe, latent energy relating to the life force. When someone's body dies, the spirit remains. Ghosts are more legend than fact, as far as anyone can tell."

I knew dying to a human was as de-rezzing was to a program. I had read about death in one of Flynn's books. The human in the story had grown old, and eventually died. I looked at Flynn. He would grow old and die, since he was a human. Being the Creator would not spare him that fate. I was suddenly sad at the inevitable loss of the man, my friend, and my eventual solitude without him. I went to him and embraced him tightly. "Don't die, Flynn! Don't die!"

He laughed as he tried to calm me. "Q, don't worry. Time moves so slowly, while I'm on the Grid, I'm practically immortal. Now stop. I'm planning on being here for a long time, ok?"

I felt his arms around me, holding me as I attempted to stop thinking about existence without him. I had never imagined being alone, because he had promised me that, should he find a way to exit the Grid, he would take me with him. And now, the probability of life without him became real once more. I squeezed my eyes shut, and willed myself to think in the moment. He was here. I was here. We had everything we needed to be safe and comfortable.

He pulled back to let me in the face. 'Are you ok now? Hmmm?' He kissed my forehead. "Stop looking for things to worry about, Q. We're fine right here, until we find a way out. So are you good now?"

I lowered my head and nodded, trying to smile for him. We sat and talked about my ride to the city, whether I had come across anything, and we laughed. When things seemed dark, Flynn was one to try to find humor in the moment. And I began to realize just how much I cared about the Creator. In one of his books, there was a subject that permeated everything. It entailed 86.9% of the stories I had read so far, whether in minute or great amounts, and it was always the same. The emotion Love. The way humans felt about each other. And imagining life without him, I knew now, I loved Flynn.


	15. Chapter 15

**I do not own Tron or Tron : Legacy.**

**Shadow Life : a journal on paper**

**Cycle 15**

Flynn and I would take walks below the safehouse, since Flynn said it was something Users did. He would tell me about places called parks, where things grew that we didn't have on the Grid. Trees, grass, and flowers, like the ones I had seen in the book I read. My gift may have been similar to a flower, but he told me they had odors Users found pleasant. Data had no such attribute.

"Quorra, look at this." Flynn had found a small piece of operative data. Since the Outlands held so little energy, it was unique finding anything with even a spark of independent output. He showed me the dully glowing bit of data.

"It's beautiful, Flynn. May I have it?"

He handed it to me, saying, "Sure. Maybe you can make a necklace out of it."

I took the lit fragment, happy I could keep it. "Thank you."

So often, we would be together without exchanging a word. It was strange how comfortable I felt with the Creator. I knew without him, I would not have survived the Purge, and he often told me that I kept him sane. Both outcasts from the city, we only had each other. Flynn knew that there were programs still sympathetic to him, but without any freedom, it was a fatal error to attempt any communication.

Sometimes, without Flynn's knowledge, I would sneak close to the city in the runner, and watch the activity there. On the surface, it looked the same, but if I ventured close to the Games grid, I could see that the tormentor Clu was giving programs what they wanted, a chance to feel alive and safe by watching others perish in the Games. As long as you were in the stands, you weren't on the Grid. This false sense of security would be short-lived for any program suspected of being a member of the resistance. There was a small faction of programs who still wanted communication with their Users. They wanted the Creator to be in charge again. There just hadn't been a fully orchestrated effort to dethrone Clu. Fear and deception had replaced awe in the city, when Clu had replaced Flynn.

I had just finished viewing a light cycle race from atop my favorite hiding place, when, as I was heading back to the hidden runner, an explosion rocked the main plaza below the End of Line tower. Programs scattered as debris filled the area. In the midst of the chaos, I was overrun by several programs, who in fear, were attempting to escape, knocking me down. Stunned, I tried to rise but found my leg damaged. Pixel cubes were leaking from my wound. I had to get back to Flynn.

Picking myself up, I was able to hobble to the runner, and leave the city. As I drove past the city center, I looked back, seeing programs being rounded up in groups by Clu's Black Guard. The return home seemed interminable, but finally I reached the entrance to the drive. Once I had parked the runner, I dragged myself to the lift. Finally reaching the top, I called out, " Flynn..." before falling to the floor.

"Quorra!" I heard him say, but did not see him, as my eyes were closed to the pain. I felt him pick me up, and taking me into my room, he lay me on the bed. "What happened? Where were you?" Panic was obvious in his voice. I knew he would be angry with me, but I couldn't lie to him.

"I was..." I winced, "I was in the city."

"You were what!" he replied angrily. "Haven't I warned you...damn, Quorra!"

I knew he was disappointed with me. I felt his hands touching my leg, and I lay back, comforted by his touch. But finally, he turned me, taking my disk from my back. I opened my eyes, watching as he sought the damaged code. It was so slight, a system reboot wouldn't even be necessary.

"Once I knew a program named Ram. If only I knew then what I know now, he might still be with us." His voice sounded regretful.

I wondered who this Ram was. "Flynn, what happened to him?"

As he worked on me, he replied, "It was back on the old Grid, when I first met Tron. I was thrown onto the game grid with both of them. We escaped, but Ram was damaged in a fight. I didn't know my power then, and he de-rezzed." He stopped for a moment as he remembered. Then shaking his head, he continued mending my leg. We waited as the wound re-pixelated, my leg finally whole again. He helped me up to see that all was well.

I walked on the leg with no problem. Then I faced him to accept the consequences of what I had done.

"Now how did you get damaged in the first place, Quorra?"

"There was an explosion," I explained. "in the Plaza. Resistors, I imagine. I got caught up in a group of programs as they fled." I lowered my head, ashamed I had caused Flynn displeasure.

He grabbed my upper arms. "Don't ever let me catch you going off without telling me, do you understand? What if you hadn't been able to get back, huh? I would be sitting here, not knowing where you were or if you were ok." He stopped ranting at me, long enough to pull me to him in a tight embrace. "Quorra, you don't realize how important you are." He stumbled for words, finally saying only, "Man, if I had lost you..." as he hugged me.

I wrapped my arms around him, letting myself be held. I had no comprehension his reaction would be this angry. "I'm sorry," I said into his chest.

He pulled back from me, still gripping my arms, when one hand reached up to brush back my hair as he looked into my face. His eyes seemed sorrowful. "I can't lose you, Q. Don't you understand?"

I nodded, as I noticed the look in his eyes changing. He gave me a slight smile, as he leaned down, giving me a kiss. Unlike his usual kiss on the cheek or forehead, this was on my mouth. He looked at me once more, then kissed me harder. Surprise kept me from saying anything, but this time when he pulled back, he also pushed me away from him.

"I'm sorry, Quorra. I shouldn't have done that. Just go..." he said as he turned away from me.

"Flynn..." I started toward him, my hand reaching out, but he interrupted me.

"No, Quorra, it's wrong. I'm sorry. I had no right." He went out onto the patio, leaving me standing alone in the main room.

Why was he rejecting me? I didn't understand how one moment he could kiss me, and the next, push me away. He had never done this to me. I wanted to go out to him, and ask him why he was treating me this way, but instead, I went to the lift. When I reached the lower level, I got on the lightcycle, and left the house. If Flynn didn't want me there, I wouldn't stay.

**To be continued**


	16. Chapter 16

**I do not own Tron or Tron : Legacy.**

**Shadow Life : a journal on paper**

**Cycle 16**

As I drove away, I had no idea where to go. There weren't too many safe places on the Grid these days. Flynn's home had become my home as well, and there I felt comfortable, cared for and free. Now I had no home.

I drove along until I reached the spot we had our pic-nic. I left the light cycle, and walked to the edge of the Sea, finding a large, flat piece of data. I sat down, bringing my knees up and hugged them to my chest. The Sea was flat, with only a few waves coming in. I leaned my head on my knees, wondering what I had done wrong to have Flynn push me away. He had always been kind and protective, but his anger only made me think something had changed in his feelings for me. Perhaps I had disappointed him in some way. I was busily reading his books, and enjoying the many tales of User, no, human lives. Had I not asked him enough questions? Had I insulted him in some way?

When I raised my head, liquid dripped down my face. I brought my fingers up to my cheeks, and drew them away, wet. It was like the time Flynn had leaked from his eyes when he told me how much he missed Sam. He called them tears. I was panicking. My eyes had never leaked before. I furiously wiped the moisture from my face.

I was doing this when I heard the light runner come up behind me, stopping near where I'd left the lightcycle. Knowing it was Flynn, I didn't move, but waited to see what he would do. If he wanted to yell at me again, or tell me to go away, I wasn't going to listen.

"Quorra, thank god. It's not safe for you to go off on your own." He stood behind me, still berating me as he had at the house.

As I hung my head, something inside me broke, and I felt real pain. The leg wound was perfectly rezzed. Why was I hurting? I started to leak again, and brushed the tears away before Flynn noticed and yelled at me for that.

Instead, he sat beside me. He said nothing, but only looked out over the now flat Sea. Finally, he asked, "Why did you run off?"

I didn't look at him, as I answered, "You told me to go."

The silence was broken by his exhalation of breath. "I didn't mean for you to leave, Quorra. I only meant..."

Flynn turned his head to peer at me in the darkness. The only light we had came from the electro-circuits of his jacket. But it was enough for him to see the wetness on my face, which, no matter how much I wiped, would continue to leak from my eyes. He turned to me, placing a hand beneath my chin. He forced me to look at him, but I lowered my eyes so I wouldn't have to see the hatred in his eyes. His other arm went behind me, draping across my shoulders. "Quorra, look at me."

I refused, and tried to twist away from his arm which held me from behind. Flynn wouldn't let me go. Tears now flowed unchecked. I felt his arms pull me towards him as he embraced me, chuckling.

"Q, I had no idea you could cry."

Into his chest, I mumbled, "I don't like tears. They're very wet."

He laughed harder, his chest moving beneath my head. I wanted to push him away, but it felt good to have Flynn's arms around me. He stopped laughing, and let me sit up to wipe my face dry. "Quorra, it was all my fault. I don't want you to leave. I felt bad for kissing you. I had no right to do that to you. Forgive me?"

I tried to smile, but it wouldn't come. Still, I could forgive him, if I knew what he wanted forgiveness for. "I don't understand, Flynn. Why did you get angry with me? What had I done?"

"You did nothing, Quorra. It was me. I'm trying to protect you. The relationship we have shouldn't be more than that."

I thought for a moment, calculating his meaning, when I realized, it was like my relationship with Castor, cycles ago. "Flynn, back when the ISOs still existed, we had a friend who was as one of us. You remember him. Castor."

"The proprietor of the End of Line Club," he said.

"Yes. When Clu began his campaign against the ISOs, Castor fought side by side with us, and eventually used his club to hide us. When that became too dangerous, he would give us supplies and transportation to safer locations. He and I formed a friendship that became more. He wasn't one of us, but I regarded him as very important to me. When the ISOs were all but destroyed, he...changed. You had gone into hiding. He began to speak out against you."

Flynn looked at me, his eyebrows raised in surprise.

I nodded and hung my head. "He blamed you for Clu, for the ISOs' destruction, all of it. He said you hadn't helped us when we needed the Creator most. He spoke out against Users, saying they didn't care about us." I turned to Flynn, looking into his eyes. "I told him I could no longer love him. I **believed** in you. I knew Clu was hunting you as he was any surviving ISO. I didn't blame you for creating Clu as a monster, because I knew you wouldn't do that. He was an aberration. Out of control. I left the city shortly after, and never saw Castor again."

Flynn took my hand and held it as he spoke. "Quorra, my feelings for you can't go beyond my need to protect you. You're the last surviving ISO. I can't jeopardize your safety."

"And how would you do that?" I asked, confused as to his real meaning. His clumsy attempt to protect me had only hurt me.

He looked off in the direction of the house, and asked, "Will you come back?" He rose, holding out his hand to me. "We could be stuck in here for hundreds of cycles. The portal can only be opened from the outside, and no one knows I'm here. For now, let's just see what happens, no plans, no expectations. Ok?"

I stood and placed my hand in his. Smiling, I said 'yes', and hugged him tightly, so happy, I thought my circuits would overload. I felt him give me the tiniest nuzzle to my neck and felt his lips kiss me there. He didn't push me away this time, nor would I have let him. "Flynn, let's go home," I said.

Together we walked back up to the waiting lightcycle and runner. We looked at each other, realizing we couldn't go back in the same vehicle. Flynn knew my desire from my look. "Ok, you take the runner back, Q."

I grinned, and headed for the driver's side. I turned the runner toward the hill where the house was, reassured when I saw Flynn right behind me. We were going home.

**A/N: This whole story came to me when I found a video on youtube about the relationship between Flynn and Clu, of all things. **

**.com/watch?v=h9ZPipvJKxc if this works. If not, look under Come Back Home (Flynn/Clu). At 2:48, Flynn walks away after seeing the ISOs destroyed. He heads into the Outlands, alone, and it made me wonder what his life would have been like without Quorra to keep him company all those cycles. And she most likely would have died. Anyway, just a heads up on a great fan video and my inspiration for this story.**


	17. Chapter 17

**I do not own Tron, Tron Evolution, or Tron Legacy.**

**Shadow Life : a journal on paper**

**Cycle 17**

Flynn thought it would be fun to go into the city, just once, to see how things had changed since the Purge. "Come on, Q. Staying out here for cycles at a time can get boring. We'll be careful. Look, at the first sign of danger, we'll split."

"I don't think this is a good idea, Flynn, but I won't let you go alone."

He asked for my identity disk in order to make a few alterations that would mask my signature output. I watched him, admiring the way he could work with objects so easily. But I suppose since he created the Grid, he would be able to master everything on it, Clu notwithstanding.

"I used to forge my way into all kinds of access files before I even knew about the old Grid. Forging a disk is child's play," he said, grinning. When he finished, he replaced it on my back. "Now your own mother wouldn't recognize you." Seeing my confusion, he laughed. "Never mind, Q. Just means you'll fit in beautifully."

I nodded, understanding him. Now I could enter the city, and if stopped by sentries who might read my disk, I would pass for any ordinary program. Even my ISO idents would be invisible to them. "Why do you even want to go there, Flynn? It seems like a dangerous and unnecessary venture."

"Call it an innate curiosity to see or do things that are forbidden to you, Q." He was frowning when he added, "I just want to see how much damage Clu has done. The Grid is my creation, and so is everything there. I still feel protective of it, even if I can't actually do anything for it. And as I recall, you've made careless choices. We'll be ok, Q!" He was referring to my trip to the city, where I had been injured.

We prepared ourselves, rezzing our light suits into something more neutral in design, nothing that would stand out. Just after Clu had taken over all administrative functions, just the colors of a program's circuits could get them stopped for questioning by city sentries. We didn't know if this had changed or not. It made me nervous for Flynn, but I was ready if anyone recognized him.

Flynn seemed excited by this trip of ours. I suppose being so isolated for so many cycles would make him weary of having to remain in hiding. This seemed such a huge risk. "Come on, Quorra. We're going downtown," he said to me with a wide grin.

I drove us to the outskirts of the city in the light runner, storing it amongst piles of data, where we continued the journey on foot. We came to a border entrance, where two sentries stood watch. The city was not closely guarded, since it was assumed all programs were loyal to Clu. Still, a few underground factions operated in secret, or so I had heard. Unless Clu had managed to assimilate their numbers into his loyal programs, they would still be around.

A sentry stopped us as we approached the entrance. Now we would test Flynn's forged identity disks. "Your disk, program."

"Of course," Flynn replied, handing the sentry his disk as a good complaint program would. The guard scanned it, finding nothing amiss. He then asked for mine. I waited while he inspected it, returning it once he found nothing different. It worked! Flynn had hidden a User and an ISO from detection!

We proceeded to the center of the city, where we found a large crowd milling about. "What's happening?" Flynn asked.

A program turned to us, saying with excitement, "Light cycle battle. Everyone is heading to the arena. Rinzler will be leading his team against a team of User sympathizers. It's going to be a great show."

Flynn and I looked at one another. He shrugged, and we joined the crowd heading to the arena. I knew I wasn't going to like this, and I'm sure Flynn's thoughts were going back to when the Games were a test of skill and endurance, with no de-rezzing losing programs. "Why don't we leave, Flynn? This is not something I care to see."

"Please, Q, I have to know what's been changed. We won't stay long. I promise." He held my hand so we wouldn't get separated in the mob. Their excitement was palpable, so much so, it felt oppressive to me.

Once we reached the arena, the pulsing crowd more or less led us to our seats high in the arena. It afforded us an unblocked view of the cycle grid. Soon, a ship floated over the arena, landing on the edge of the cycle area. I heard Flynn's intake of breath.

"Clu," was all he said.

I turned my head sharply toward the vessel. So Clu enjoyed watching his programs die, up close. I lowered my head, closing my eyes as I thought back to the latter days of Flynn's control of the Grid. I remembered every detail of Clu's atrocities to my people, and his betrayal of his own Creator. I felt an arm move behind me, pulling me close. I looked at Flynn as he winked at me.

"It'll be ok, Q." His eyes took in everything. He glanced around the arena, seeing with dismay the way the many thousands of programs seemed shouting out for blood, if that were possible for programs who had no blood. They stomped their feet and clapped, waiting for the combatants to show up. Then it began.

We listened as the announcements started, introducing the two teams, until finally we heard the words, "Grid is live. Initiate Light Cycle Battle." The cheering increased in intensity, as a light show blasted overhead.

The program to the left of me elbowed me, asking, "Isn't this the best? His Excellency never fails to put on a good show." He faced the arena, clapping and cheering, as the unfortunate programs took their places on the game grid.

I couldn't hold my tongue and replied acidly, "You'd think so if you were out there."

Flynn hissed in my ear, "Q, stop that!"

I folded my arms, refusing to look forward, intent on not paying attention to anything that happened on the grid. I could still hear though, the roaring engines telling me the direction they were going as they headed around the arena. I looked up suddenly, when I heard a crash. One of the cycles had been de-rezzed, along with its rider. I felt something I wasn't aware I was capable of feeling. I felt ill. Flynn had once spoken of humans being prone to sickness, where their bodies would weaken and suffer a variety of ailments. Programs could not get sick, although viruses were a real threat, as we had experienced with Abraxas. What I was feeling was due to the barbaric way Clu controlled his programs. I leaned against Flynn. His arm was a comfort to me, but I wanted to leave. I squeezed my eyes shut for the rest of the game.

Finally, I heard, "Q, let's go." Flynn grabbed my arm, keeping me close, since leaving the arena seemed more dangerous than coming in had been. Once outside, we headed for the city center again, part of the crowd heading in that direction.

As we passed a group of programs, one seemed to look our way intently, following us with his eyes. I should have looked away, but I wondered why he was staring at us. "Flynn, someone recognizes us," I said, not sure if it was him or me.

He turned briefly, sneaking a look at the chattering programs. "You're right. He does seem to be tracking us."

I became nervous. "Flynn, can we go home now?"

**To be continued...**


	18. Chapter 18

**I do not own Tron or Tron : Legacy.**

**Shadow Life : a journal on paper**

**Cycle 18**

Flynn and I slipped through the crowd, away from the prying eyes of a certain program. I was anxious that if either of us had been recognized, the sentries would be alerted. We needed to remain undercover until we were near the outskirts of the city, and could reach the light runner. I scanned the area for any behavior indicating we had been given away. There was none.

"You worry too much, Q," Kevin teased me.

I turned to him. "And you don't worry enough," I whispered.

"You expect to see Recognizers at every turn. Relax, and you won't stand out."

I knew his words belied his true feelings, as I noticed his eyes glancing from left to right. At least he did care enough to be watchful. I smiled, nodded at passing programs, and was generally as relaxed as I dare be. That was when I noticed that program following us. When we slowed, he would slow. When we went around a corner, he would be right behind us. He wasn't calling for security, though.

Flynn's tone changed. "I see him too, Quorra."

We rounded a corner, at which time I pulled my disk, and waited. When the program came around the corner, my disk was at his throat. "Don't move!" I hissed.

"Wait! I haven't called the sentries. I...I know who you are, Creator. I need your help." He looked down at the hand holding the disk. "Please, you can put that away."

Flynn nodded at me. I lowered the disk, but kept it handy. "Dude, who are you, and why have you been following us?" Flynn asked, his hands on his waist.

"I'm Pax, Creator. I used to be an honored Disk Wars warrior. In my last match, I wasn't successful in defeating my opponent. He didn't de-rezz me, but I was finished in the Games." He handed his disk to Flynn. "You can check the damage." He looked at me with pleading eyes as if he knew I had some influence with Flynn. "When I saw you, I knew that you could repair me. Please, Creator, I would be ever grateful."

Flynn looked at me, then directed his attention at the program. "This is Quorra, Pax. Q, why don't you keep an eye out. I'll handle this."

While I stood watching for any intruders, Flynn examined the program's disk. Pax showed him one hand minus its fingers, and a large gash in his side. Flynn was able to repair the gash with ease, by manipulating the code in the disk.

Pax grinned at me, causing me to feel foolish for being so distrusting. But that's what the atmosphere on the Grid is like these days. One never knows who to trust. I smiled back at him, while Flynn worked on the hand, a more difficult procedure due to the moving parts, and the circuitry there being more delicate. When Flynn finished, replacing the disk onto his port, Pax tested the hand, stretching his newly rezzed fingers.

"Thank you, Creator! I knew you would help me."

"No problem. It was my pleasure, man. What kind of program were you, Pax?"

"I was a military basic training program. I had access to over 3000 years of User battle strategy and combat tactics. When Clu found out, he put me in the Games. I was fighting against Elsor, a combatant second only to Rinzler. I lost but wasn't de-rezzed. I calculate I was fortunate not to have won, because Rinzler would have been my next opponent. I probably **would** have been de-rezzed in that case."

"I hope you're not thinking of going back into the Games," I said, hating to see the work Flynn had done on him be wasted on the game grid. "There's more you can do to contribute to the Grid." I turned to Flynn. "We should get out of here."

"I know, Quorra. It's just...it's all I know. And I'm good at it," the grateful program said, clenching and unclenching his hand as he spoke.

I was still nervous, and wanted to get Flynn out of the city. "Pax, why not come with us," I offered.

Pax looked at me in surprise, then at Flynn, who nodded.

Just as we started to continue along the path, two sentries rounded the corner, and seeing us, demanded our identity disks. I quickly stepped up, hoping Flynn would go unnoticed. Pax waited silently at his side.

One sentry checked my disk, and again it passed inspection. Flynn kept his face turned away from the sentry while he checked Pax's disk. "I know you, program. You were a Disk Wars combatant. Weren't you damaged and drummed from the Games?" The sentry noted no such data on Pax's disk. He looked at the silent Pax through narrowed eyes. "Seems you've been repaired, program. By whom?" His eyes turned to Flynn. "You there. Come here."

I reacted without thinking, grabbing for my disk, and aiming it at the sentry. He deflected it with his light stick before it hit him. Retrieving it, I did a flip toward the other sentry, fighting him one on one, disk versus light stick. I noticed Pax protecting Flynn against the other sentry, his new repairs showing his skill as he'd said. I fought my sentry hard, but he was well trained, and I found myself tiring. Taking a hit, I stumbled against the building. Pax noticed, and headed for me, swinging his disk at the sentry who was now raising his lightstick at me. The sentry suddenly de-rezzed into hundreds of datacubes.

"Come on, Quorra." Pax said, holding me up. "Creator, you have to go, now! I'll handle the sentry. Just go save yourselves."

Flynn looked at Pax, smiled his gratitude and grabbing me by the arm, we headed toward the edge of the city. I looked back, to see Pax fighting the last sentry with ease, until several more approached. I stopped, watching as he valiantly fought on, although he was now outnumbered. Flynn was tugging at my arm. I resisted, saying, "Let me go back!"

"Quorra, we have to go. If anything happens to you...you can't...look, Pax sacrificed himself for nothing if you die now. Let's move."

Reluctantly, I went with Flynn, knowing there was no way that Pax would survive.

We reached the light runner, but I had no desire to drive. Flynn took over that duty. On the return home, I said nothing, felt nothing. In my memory, I could see Pax courageously battling the sentries. He saved both Flynn and me. Seemed a waste, being repaired only to give up his existence for us.

Once home, I went upstairs and to my room, Flynn calling me as I shut the door. I lay on my bed, and relived Pax's death.

I heard a light knock on my door, but I didn't respond. Flynn entered the room when he heard no answer. "Quorra." He came over to the bed and sat on the opposite corner. "Quorra, talk to me."

I didn't want to speak, feeling too many mixed emotions. Still..."It was my fault."

"What was your fault, Q?"

My eyes started leaking, as I tried to explain. "If I...if I hadn't drawn my disk, we might have bluffed our way out. Instead, my rashness..."

"Q, sometimes we act without thinking. Everyone does that. Pax could have come with us, but he wanted to make sure **we** got away safely." He sighed. "Don't you think I beat myself up a hundred times a day for leaving Tron to Clu the way I did? He chose to sacrifice himself for me. If I don't accept that, then I'm doing his gift an injustice, and so are you, to Pax."

I couldn't help myself, and I began to cry in earnest. It was a human thing to do, and I didn't fight it. I felt Flynn slide up the bed, his weight tugging it down as he nestled against my back. He placed his arm around me, his hand slipping into mine. I felt his breath against my neck, as his other hand stroked my hair rhythmically. "Go ahead and cry, Q. You'll feel better." He held me like that for a long while, until my eyes stopped leaking and I was able to picture Pax in my memory without the tears. "Some things are worth the risk, Quorra," Flynn whispered against my ear.

He was right. Pax risked his life for us, and lost. But in a way, he'd won, since both the Creator and the Grid's last ISO survived. I closed my eyes and said aloud, "Thank you, Pax." I did learn one thing. I was never going to the city again.

**A/N: famous last words, Q.**


	19. Chapter 19

**I do not own Tron or Tron Legacy.**

**Shadow Life : a journal on paper**

**Cycle 19**

Time passed, my pain had healed, and I found myself thinking about the world outside the system. Flynn had spoken of the sun that gave his world life, and about his son, whom he had given life. I wasn't sure about the mechanics of it, but he once mentioned having a wife, who was mother to his son Sam. She had de-rezzed, died I learned was the actual human term. That left Sam with only Flynn as his parental figure.

"Dad, Quorra, the word is Dad."

I nodded slowly. "You're Sam's Dad. What do dads do, besides teaching their sons to drive?" I sat crossed legged on the floor next to Flynn, who was perched on his meditation cushions. If he had kept his eyes closed, I would know I was interrupting him, but for now, he seemed amenable to talking with me.

"Kids. What do you not do? You teach them to play sports, help with their homework, hug them when they're upset or hurt, just...be there for them, Q. Of course, I was busy with the Grid and ENCOM, and maybe didn't spend as much time with him as I should have. His grandparents took a big load off me, but when I was with him, I tried to make every moment count. Back then, I don't think Sam complained. But I can imagine that changing now."

I knew it was hard for him to think about not being with his son. "What one thing would you have taught him, had you been there?"

He thought for a moment. "I guess I'd have taught him to ride."

"Ride?" I asked.

"Motorcycles. They're kinda like light cycles, Q. I had a sweet one, a real beauty called a Ducati. I don't know what's happened to her, but I hope Sam takes her when he's old enough. She needs to be taken care of, instead of sitting around, neglected."

I knew he wasn't talking just about his motorcycle. I found myself wanting to meet Flynn's son. I had not had the chance to meet any Users except Flynn, and the possibility of meeting Flynn's son was exciting to me. A miniature version of the Creator. But with the portal closed, there would be little chance of Flynn leaving, and unless someone stumbled upon his project, no one else would be coming in. I wondered if there would be any way he could make peace with Clu. The two had been apart for awhile now, yet I wasn't too sure the Control Program would have any desire to return things to the way they once were. Clu liked being in charge. The Grid was his domain now.

"What are you thinking about, Quorra?" he asked me, maybe spurred on by my silence.

"Just the lost possibilities. If you weren't stuck here, you could be teaching Sam so much. And one day, you might have brought him here. I would like to meet him."

"And I want you to meet him, Q. He's a chip off the old block," he said, grinning.

I had no idea what he meant, but I did know that light in his eyes as he spoke about Sam. Sometimes, I think I saw it there for me. He was proud of his son. Was he proud of me too?

Flynn had shut his eyes, so I knew he was done talking. When he did that, I would usually sneak away. But this time, I waited, perusing his face. He looked so much like Clu, or rather, the other way around, Clu being the creation. His hair was lighter than mine, and he often wore what he called scruff, referring to the hair he allowed to grow on his face. His eyes were a lighter blue than mine, with a natural sparkle that lit them when he smiled. A remnant of that smile was still there, no doubt because he was still thinking of Sam. I found myself smiling as I looked at the Creator. He was as dear to me as a certain program had been, before the Purge. And my gratitude to Anon, the monitor program who had saved my life, knew no bounds. He had been de-rezzed rescuing me from Clu. Flynn had saved me too. I owed him so much. If it took a 1000 cycles, I would repay him somehow.

As I sat there remembering, Flynn opened the eye closest to me, and asked, "Quorra, what are you doing?"

I felt like I had been caught with my hand in the cookie jar. I didn't know exactly what that phrase referred to, but I had read it in one of his books. And he had caught me watching him while grinning. Understandable that he wondered what I was doing.

He still had one eye open, saying, "You look pretty when you blush, Q." The eye closed, and Flynn went back to his meditation.

I rose off the floor and slipped away. I contemplated what he had meant, when he said I was pretty when I blushed. What did pretty mean? What was a blush? I would ask him later. My circuits dimmed, telling me it was time for some energy. I went to the kitchen, leaving Flynn in the main room. As I sipped the glowing drink, I wondered what the future would hold for us. Were we safe? Would Clu ever find us? I also decided I would ask Flynn what a cookie jar was.


	20. Chapter 20

**I do not own Tron or Tron Legacy.**

**Shadow Life :a journal on paper**

**Cycle 20**

While Flynn was meditating, I went to my room to read. This book I had chosen detailed interesting information on human history. Some of it was not very nice. It was difficult for me to imagine this to be true, if humans were anything like Flynn. He couldn't be mean if he tried. There were times he lost his temper, but only once did he get angry with me, and that was because he worried about me.

I heard a light tapping on my door. "Come in," I said. I placed the book down when Flynn entered. "You're finished with your meditations early," I observed. Typically, he could sit there in the one pose for quite some time.

"Yeah, can't seem to concentrate for some reason." He sat on the bed beside me. "Quorra, why were you staring at me? Was there something you wanted to talk about?" He tilted his head expectantly at me.

I lowered my head, not wanting to look at him. I still felt embarrassed at being caught studying him. "No, no," I replied, shaking my head.

"Come on, Q. You can tell me anything." He waited for me patiently.

I wasn't sure what to say. Honesty was usually easy between us. But I chose to respond by asking him a question. "Flynn, you called me pretty. What is pretty?"

"Hm, let's see. Well, do you remember the sculpture you made, and how Radia praised it for it's beauty. The gift you made for me was beautiful too. Something that is pretty is pleasing, attractive. It gives a person pleasure just looking at it. You are pretty."

I smiled, suddenly feeling shy in front of the Creator. I looked at him and said only, "Thank you."

"See? There's that blush again. I wasn't aware ISOs could blush." He took my hand, and stood. "Come here." Flynn led me to the mirror that hung on the wall above my dresser. He faced me towards the mirror, his hands on my shoulders as he stood behind me. "Now look there. What do you see?"

"I see myself," I answered.

"No, no, Q. What do you see? Describe yourself as if I can't see you."

I stared at myself in the mirror, trying to understand what he wanted of me. "My hair is black. My eyes are blue."

I heard Flynn sigh. "Q, you don't get it. Describing to me your physical features isn't telling me that you're pretty."

Frustrated, I turned to face him. "Then tell me what I'm supposed to be looking for." I let him turn me back around, again facing the mirror.

He lifted a hand, and bushed back my hair from my face. He traced my cheek with a finger, tilting my chin up one way, then another. "Do you see it now?"

"No," I said dejectedly.

"Do you know what I see? I see charming naivete, a passion for learning, a growing wisdom I may come to envy one day."

I interrupted him, saying, "But none of those things are physical attributes."

"Well, sure, Quorra. Physical beauty is part of it. But when you smile, you're pretty. When you get that little frown as you try to understand something you've read, you're pretty." His finger touched my cheek again. "When you blush, you're pretty. What made you blush?"

I lowered my eyes so I wouldn't have to see Flynn inspecting me. "You caught me with my hand in the cookie jar."

He laughed out loud at that, hugging me from behind. "Quorra, you are something else. Do you even know what that means?"

I had to admit, "No, I don't."

He let me go, and stood back a bit. When I turned to look at him, he said, "Kids will often want a treat before dinner. Moms would have fresh baked cookies in a container called a cookie jar. If the kid was brave enough, he might try to steal a cookie from the jar without getting caught by his mom. If he did get caught, imagine how embarrassing that would be."

I nodded, thinking that I did feel that way. "Yes, I get it now. I do." I smiled, then laughed, a bit more at ease.

"So why were you feeling embarrassed, Q?"

I peered up at the ceiling, not sure how to answer. Honesty, I decided. "I was looking at you, thinking how pretty you are." I frowned and lowered my head instantly, as I heard Flynn stifle a laugh. "It's true," I said, defensively. I wished he hadn't laughed at me. I looked up straight into his eyes. "You're pretty when you've created something, that look of pride in your eyes, the way you get excited and say 'yes!'. Sometimes, you bite your lower lip when you're concentrating so hard on a difficult problem."

"And you've been checking me out," he said matter-of-factly. He ran his hand through his hair, and covered his mouth, rubbing his chin. He put his hands on my shoulders. "Quorra..." He stopped talking as he stared into my eyes.

I waited, unsure if he was angry at me for calling him pretty. Maybe he didn't understand what I was trying to say. I found that I was unable to take my eyes away from his. It felt as if a 100 cycles had passed, neither of us moving.

His fingers tilted up my chin. He bent forward, pressing his lips on mine gently. When he pulled back, Flynn waited, saying nothing.

Thinking that it was my turn now, I leaned up towards him, and pressed my lips on his. I felt his arms slip around me, as he hugged me closely. This time, there was no recrimination, just a warmth that suffused my being. In his arms, I felt safe and protected, and ...I remembered something I had read in one of the books. I felt...loved.

**A/N: I know many people see Flynn and Quorra's relationship more as a father/daughter or mentor/student one. I feel those two were forced together for a very long time and both seem similar in age at this time. Now, if enough readers say, no, don't do that, I'll center the relationship back to something more platonic. If you agree with me that, for some time at least, Flynn and Quorra had something deeper going, it will get a bit more romantic. Thanks for reading!**


	21. Chapter 21

**I do not own Tron or Tron : Legacy.**

**Shadow Life : A journal on paper**

**Cycle 21**

Some time had passed since Flynn had kissed me. I didn't know what to say to him afterward. When he had kissed me before, he told me to go away, but later said he didn't mean it. Why would showing affection be such an issue with Users. Programs often did, and ISOs had an even greater need for mutual affection and friendship than created programs. I decided to say nothing, nor approach Flynn about it, although I didn't want it to be awkward between us. The Creator was more than my protector, he was my friend.

We were just sitting down to dinner, Flynn having created a concoction he called spaghetti with meatballs. I sat at the table and watched as he set down a large bowl of a thin stringy material covered in a red liquid. The round things were the meatballs, I assumed. He smiled as he served me, taking my plate and placing some of the strings on it. He set 4 meatballs to the side, and returned my plate to me. I looked down at the plate, picking up one of the strings, wondering how one was supposed to eat it. "What is it?" I asked.

"That is a noodle. Ok, now first, pick up your fork." Flynn picked his up, so I followed suit. "Next, twirl the noodles onto the fork." He showed me how, by sticking the fork tines down into the mass of noodles. He spun the fork around, gathering them up into the tines. Then he put the fork in his mouth and chewed. When he had swallowed, he grinned broadly, and said, "Now you try."

I placed my fork into the noodles and spun it. When I had stopped, there was a large mass of material, too large for anyone to swallow. I heard Flynn give a stifled laugh, as I looked from the mass on my fork to his mirthful face. I laughed too, since there wasn't any way I could put this into my mouth. The situation was too ridiculous to take seriously.

"Ok, Q, here's another way." He cut the noodles with his fork and scooped them up, eating them easily, since now they were in manageable pieces.

I tried this method, and found it much better. I then speared a meatball with my fork, and put it into my mouth. It was too big. I panicked, not sure what to do.

"Quorra, don't try to eat it all at once!" Flynn cried out.

My eyes went wide as I tried to chew on the massive meatball. I couldn't get my tongue out of the way as I bit down, and moving the food object to the side of my mouth was impossible. This wasn't going to work. I spit the meatball out, frowning at it.

By now, Flynn was having trouble stifling his hysterics, holding his hand over his mouth as he laughed. "Q...you *snort* you really need to...oh, god, let me show you before you choke yourself." He took his knife and fork, speared the meatball and cut it in half. Then he cut the half in half. Now he had four pieces, each more easily eaten. "See now?"

I stared at my plate, and found myself grinning despite feeling frustrated. After all, this was only digitized food product, and not a Grid warrior that I was fighting. I cut my meatball and tasted a piece, finding it very good. Then I experimented with combining a piece of meatball with some of the noodle pieces, and dipping that in some sauce. Flynn nodded at me and winked, so I knew I was doing it correctly.

After we had eaten dinner, Flynn brought out two bowls, one of which he placed in front of me. Each bowl contained a rounded mass of something pink. I looked at him, watching as he dipped a spoon into the substance. "This is ice creme, Quorra. It wasn't easy to make, since digitizing it to be at the right temperature proved difficult. It was either too warm to eat, or too cold to cut into. I think it's just right now. Go ahead. It's strawberry."

I waited for him to eat it, then took some myself. I let the substance melt on my tongue, noticing a burst of flavor as it did. I smiled. "This is really good, Flynn."

"It actually goes very well with cake."

I looked up at him. "It does? Can we try that sometime?"

"Sure, Q." He was proving to be quite tolerant of my love for cake.

We finished our dessert, and before I could rise from my chair, Flynn was behind me, ready to pull it out from under me. "What are you doing?" I asked, puzzled. I could feel him so close to me, that any movement on my part would mean touching him.

He leaned over my shoulder, whispering, "Just being a gentleman."

I shrugged slightly, unsure what had come over him. I guess he wasn't ignoring me after all, so I relaxed, certain that we were still friends.

After he had taken care of the dishes, we sat at the short table for a game of "Go". I had learned some of his patience when playing the game, but was still inclined to hastily-made moves. At least I was improving.

We were sitting, playing and not saying much, when Flynn spoke up. "I missed my wife for a very long time, Quorra."

"Jordan," I said. Flynn had mentioned her to me, and had even told me a few stories about her and Sam.

"She got the short end of the stick, with me running back and forth to the Grid, and trying to run ENCOM. She was so patient though. I just wish I had another chance to do things right."

"There's nothing wrong with missing those we care about, Flynn. I miss so many of my friends. Sometimes, I even wonder if it was wrong that I should have survived."

"Quorra, never say that! You're too important to...well, I just mean if I had another chance, I would do it right this time." He was looking at me, his gaze becoming more intense, until, feeling uncomfortable, I broke eye contact. "Quorra, do you want to pursue something more than what we have now? I don't want you to feel you have to be more than what you're ready for. You're very important to me, but I know I haven't had the best track record when it comes to women."

I wondered what he meant by track record, but I had to agree with him on one point. He had become very important to me too. Not because he was the Creator. And not because he had saved me. Flynn was becoming an extension of myself. Everything I did was for him or for us. Being an individual wasn't an issue in any of my thoughts or desires for the future. If he stayed out here in the Outlands, I would stay with him. If he wanted to confront Clu, I would stand at his side. If he found some way to return to his world, I would go with him, if I could. Flynn never ordered me to do anything, and that was the wonderful feeling of free will, which he said only the ISOs had. I could do as I wished, and I chose to be loyal to Flynn.

"Q, you look deep in thought. What are you thinking?"

Tilting my head as I pondered my next question, I tucked my legs beneath me on the cushion, and asked him, "Flynn, tell me about love."

To be Continued...

**A/N: thanks to those who voted in the friend or lover poll. I'm glad you agree with me. ;-)**


	22. Chapter 22

**A/N: I couldn't get into the system to post this chapter, darn MCP! But here it is, a day late, but hopefully not a dollar short. Enjoy.**

**I do not own Tron or Tron Legacy.**

**Shadow Life : a journal on paper**

**Cycle 22**

Flynn's eyes widened as he peered at me. He would often tell me that the ISOs, my people, were incredibly wise, if naive. I often felt naive and rarely wise, but I wanted to know things that Flynn didn't always have an answer to. He rested his chin on his fist as he sat crossed legged on his cushion, looking down as if he were contemplating his next move. I knew he was not even thinking of the game, because he usually didn't study the board that hard.

"Love is an emotion many humans don't understand," he said. "They know how they feel when they're in love with someone, but they can't always explain the feeling, how it started, and why it sometimes goes away."

"What does it feel like to be in love?" I asked, wanting to compare what I felt for Flynn with his answer.

"It's not easy to explain, Q, but I'll try. Love is an emotion that makes you feel happy just thinking about someone. You want to be with them. You like doing things for them. Being apart from them leaves a void inside you, like you've lost something valuable."

I began to smile as he described each instance, realizing what I felt for him, for Flynn, was love. I loved Flynn. When I thought he didn't want me, I ached inside in a way indescribable. When I knew he had been searching for me, and insisted I come back, I felt a happiness that lit my circuits. "Flynn, I've been with you for awhile now. You have been my savior, my protector and my friend. Isn't it normal I would love you anyway?"

"Perhaps, Q. There are several kinds of love, though. Selfless love, love for a friend, romantic love."

"Love for cake?" I asked.

Flynn laughed. "Yes, Q, love for cake. But do you understand what I mean?"

"I think so," I responded. I knew how I felt. How did Flynn feel about me?

"Flynn," I hesitated, wondering if his allowance for my preference was more for him. "Do you love me?"

"Oh, Quorra, your bluntness can be disarming at times." He stood, and walked past the barrier field, and onto the patio.

I lowered my head and bit my lip, wondering what he meant by that. He didn't answer the question, and then left? I followed, stepping through the barrier. I stood behind Flynn, and waited as he stared off into the distance.

"Quorra, when I created the Grid, it was as some technological genius who wanted to better his world by making another one, and drawing from it whatever I needed to improve things. It was arrogant and presumptuous of me to think I, alone, could make this dream come true. And now I see all the mistakes I made along the way. Hindsight doesn't do a hell of a lot of good, Q." He turned to me. "When I found you, it was like I was being given a second chance."

I looked at him, my brows raised in confusion.

"Don't you see? I was falling right back into that trap of arrogance, believing I was supposed to change the human condition, using you as the springboard."

"So?" I didn't understand what he was getting at.

He placed his hands on my shoulders. "Quorra, when you ran away, it wasn't an ISO I was losing, it was you. And it wasn't an ISO I chased after to come back home. It was you." He pulled me to him gently, and bent to kiss me lightly on my lips. "We may be stuck out here a long time."

I let him hold me, as my own arms ventured around his waist. I was unsure as to what I should do, but this came naturally. I wanted to feel Flynn as close to me as possible. "You may not have created me, but you complete me. As long as I'm with you, nothing else matters." I reached up, running the back of my hand over his scruffy cheek. I let one fingertip slide over his lips, which curved into a smile. When he bent to kiss me again, I kept my eyes open to watch him.

Abruptly, he pulled back. "Quorra, why don't you close your eyes when I kiss you?"

I shrugged. "I wanted to watch."

He laughed, hugging me to him. "Quorra, Quorra..." He held my chin with one hand, and said, "You might enjoy it more if you close your eyes. I think it has something to do with "savoring the sensation".

I gave him a quirky smile or some such thing, shaking my head slightly.

"I heard that on a commercial," he explained.

I still didn't get what he was saying, tilting my head, a frown on my face.

"Oh, never mind, Q," he said, as he pulled me to him, kissing me harder than before. My mouth involuntarily opened to the pressure of his lips on mine. Out of the corner on my eye, I could see my circuits brightening, then realized my eyes were open again. I shut them, and savored the sensation of Flynn's kisses.


	23. Chapter 23

**I do not own Tron or Tron: Legacy.**

**Shadow Life : a journal on paper**

**Cycle 23**

Flynn was busy working on something new. I was amazed at how his mind functioned. He was always coming up with new things, new ways to make our life easier. Even his decorative measures took him some time to get just right. He wanted this hideout, as he called it, to be just like his home in the outside world, which I looked at as comfortable, if not aesthetic.

As he was examining the free-form data screen, I stood behind him, my hands resting on his shoulders.

"Look here, Quorra. I have something for you to consider."

"For me?" I bent over his shoulder, checking the data screen, admiring his programming skills, but unsure what I was looking at. It appeared to be some sort of combat training codicil. What was he planning to attach it to?

Flynn turned in his seat, taking my hand in his. "Q, I want you to be able to protect yourself, just in case."

"Just in case of what?" I asked him, confused. This new programming was for me?

"You know, in case something happens to me. I may not always be here."

I began to panic. Why wouldn't the Creator always be here? Was he planning on leaving the Grid? "What do you mean, Flynn? You can't leave! And you wouldn't leave me behind, would you?"

He pulled me onto his lap, an arm around my waist, while his free hand brushed my hair from my face. It tickled me, but I wanted to hear his answer. "No, of course not, Quorra." He looked down at the floor, as if not clear on what he wanted to say. Then, "If Clu captures me, if I'm hurt beyond repair, anything that removes me from the picture, I want you to be able to take care of yourself." He looked at the data screen. "See, this program will give you a defense upgrade. Simply put, Q, you'll become a Ninja warrior extraordinaire."

I shifted in his lap, saying not without some annoyance in my voice, "Is this upgrade really necessary?" I touched his face, feeling beneath my fingertips, the scruff on his skin. "Nothing will happen to you, Flynn. I won't let it."

He pressed his lips to mine in a quick kiss. "That's the whole point, Quorra. With your upgrade, you'll be able to keep anything from happening. It'll give you an advantage." He cupped my cheek. "Are you afraid of the upgrade?"

I lowered my head, calculating the possibilities. "Not that, no. Just imagining you gone..." My eyes threatened to start leaking, as I thought of a world without Flynn. I wrapped my arms around him, burying my face in his neck.

"Maybe this isn't a good time to talk about this," he said, his arms supporting me on his lap.

"No!" I cried. "If this will ensure that I can protect you, then do it." I looked into his clear blue eyes, and bent to kiss his cheek. "I'm not afraid."

Flynn told me to lie on my bed after he'd removed my disk. His fingers danced over the internal settings, integrating the new programming with my own. He then reset my disk, and allowed me to reboot. Immediately, I felt the new coding take hold. Information flooded my being, giving me knowledge I never had before. Once completed, I sat up and flexed my hands.

"How do you feel?" he asked, holding out a hand to me.

I stood and walked, checking my balance and movement. Everything seemed just fine. "I feel good, but what's changed?"

We went into the main room, where I saw a funny looking addition. To the side of the room and in a corner, Flynn had rezzed up a hanging device. "Your sparring dummy. This is for you to practice on, Quorra." He handed me a baton. "I was keeping this for you, since I have no use for it. You had it with you when I found you. You've had the basic knowledge needed to use this all along, of course, but now your upgrade will also allow you to use many of the vehicles on the Grid."

I was surprised, since I had been able to drive Flynn's light cycle and runner with ease. He was telling me I could now make use of other vehicles, including light jets.

He must have noticed the smile on my face, as he said, "I see that light in your eyes, Q. I don't want you running off to the city to hijack a Recognizer."

I laughed, promising not to do anything so foolish. I went over to the sparring dummy, and immediately began kicking at it, knowing what to do. I saw Flynn eyeing me with admiration, as I practiced flips, jumps and other movements that felt no more strange to me than walking across the room. The dummy took several jabs from the light stick I had rezzed from the baton. My speed and accuracy were better than ever. His additional programming was working well. "If Clu or any of his programs attempt to harm you, Flynn, I'll kick their collective butts."

"Quorra, where did you learn that?" He laughed, his face turning pink.

"From you," I answered, grinning.

He ran his fingers through his hair, "Oh, yeah. Forgot." He came to my side. "That was great, Q. You'll be an even more radical combat player than before." He hugged me tightly, as I beamed, knowing I would be of greater use to the Creator.

Still..."Flynn, is this really necessary?" I wondered if he knew something he wasn't telling me.

He put his arms around me, pulling me close. "If anything happens to me, you have to survive, Q. You'll have my disk, and if there's any way to leave the Grid...well, just hang on to it."

I removed my own disk from my back. "Can I fight better with this as well?" I replaced it, trying to think of myself as a disk warrior.

"Yes, of course. Everything will be an improvement."

I suddenly felt sad, even though Flynn was here, we were safe, and I wasn't looking far into the future.

He tilted my head back and kissed me again, his power becoming mine as my circuits brightened, and my mood changed to one of peace. He could do that to me with a word or a touch. I knew that as the Creator, Flynn was used to planning ahead. That wasn't in my nature however. As he hugged me, he whispered in my ear, "Just in case, Quorra. Just in case."

**A/N: I just wanted to add a chapter on my interpretation of how Q became so good a fighter, as to save Sam's butt a few times. Also to validate Flynn's statement that he wrote SOME of Quorra's programming, but not her more complex coding. Thanks for reading!**


	24. Chapter 24

**I do not own Tron or Tron: Legacy.**

**Shadow Life : a journal on paper**

**Cycle 24**

I stood on the patio, looking off at the distant glow of the city, my arms hugging myself. Sometimes, and I never told Flynn this, I missed being involved in the busy activity that was once a thriving community of programs from every strata of existence. I know he hadn't meant it to be what it had become, and I would never blame him for what Clu had done, but I missed it all the same. My own ISO community was close-knit, the city beautiful, and that was gone from me as well. When I closed me eyes, I could hear the cries as everything we were was destroyed without mercy by Clu's attack force. I suddenly felt a warm presence behind me, and opened my eyes.

"Quorra, you look like you've lost your best friend."

I didn't tell him what I'd been thinking, knowing he'd just feel bad in his misguided attempt to cheer me. I had learned so much from Flynn these past few cycles, but what could I do with all the information? It wasn't safe to go to the city. The Outlands was all that was left for us. It seemed unjust that Flynn, the Creator of the Grid, should be exiled from his own creation by a program he made. Yet, he never seemed to show any bitterness about what had happened. The only regret he **had** shown was being separated from Sam. "I was just wishing that things could be like they used to be." I turned to look at him. "Don't you ever want that?"

"Dwelling on the past usually accomplishes nothing, Quorra. If there's something we can do, we'll do it. If not, it's better to be safe than sorry."

I turned on him, maybe a bit too harshly, saying, "How can you say that, Flynn? Doing nothing means handing the Grid over to Clu without a fight."

"He already has it, Q," he replied, as if resigned to the prospect of spending the rest of his existence here, however long that might be.

"There are factions in the city, pockets of resistance who don't like what Clu has done to the Grid. Why can't we join up with them? You're the Creator, Flynn! With your power, they could be made stronger than any of Clu's forces." Flynn's additions to my fighting skills gave me new-found courage and a desire to defeat Clu's tyranny.

Flynn didn't get excited, as I had hoped. "You want us to organize the resistance to fight Clu?" I felt his hands firmly on my shoulders. "If you remember, you tried fighting Clu and were nearly killed."

"I know," I sighed. Back then, my anger at what the Control Program had done to my people sustained me, keeping fear away. But fear kept one from making hasty and ill-advised decisions. "Flynn, do you think it will ever get better? This is your world more than his. It just isn't fair."

"What isn't fair was creating a world and having such high expectations. I can't believe my own arrogance. Seeking perfection, Quorra, what in the hell does that mean anyway?" I watched as he stood at the edge of the patio, a sheer drop below where he stood. I think he must have sensed my concern, since he turned around and said, "Don't worry, Q, I'm not planning to jump."

I went to his side. "You've achieved so much, Flynn. You couldn't predict the future, right?" When he didn't answer, I continued. "There was no way for you to know that the ISOs would come into existence, or that Clu would betray you and destroy them. Planning and executing your ideas are things you do as the Creator, but what happens outside that...you can't control it."

"All the things I can do here, and turning back the clock isn't one of them," he said, an infinite sadness on his face.

I felt badly for bringing up his limitations. He did the best he could, but Clu had been too powerful, feeding off the very resistance Flynn exhibited. If only we could unite the various groups of programs who showed any inclination to rebel against Clu, then maybe we'd have a chance to bring about change. But until Flynn himself found the strength to stand up to his own creation, the Grid would remain a dark and dismal place. _Someday_, I thought.

"Quorra, I know it's hard for you to understand. And I agree, something has to be done. Just not yet." He brushed back my hair, and bent to kiss me.

I was beginning to appreciate his kisses. It gave me an awareness of him, and because of my reactions, an awareness of myself. I smiled at the warmth I felt inside, as I hugged Flynn tightly. His power flowed into me, lighting my circuits. I laughed from the sheer joy of it. Looking up into his eyes, I said something I had never articulated to him. "I love you, Flynn."

He stopped smiling, his eyes examining my face. "You're blushing again, Q." I lowered my head, when I felt his hand at my chin, tilting my head up. "Naw, Quorra. Look at me."

I gazed into his blue eyes, now touched by the grin on his face. Laughing once more, I buried my face in his neck, feeling his warm breath on mine. I looked up at him, and closing my eyes, waited for him to kiss me.

"Open your eyes, Quorra. Open them." When I had done as he asked, he said, "You've been my strength ever since we found ourselves lone companions. Man, I'd have gone crazy without you. You keep me grounded, Q."

Flynn bent to kiss me then, his lips firm on mine. The pressure forced my mouth open, and I felt his tongue dart in. I pulled back, the sensation an odd one. But Flynn was patient, and I let myself enjoy what he was doing to me.

Finally, he released me. We went to stand at the edge of the patio, watching the city from a distance. Flynn stood behind me, his arms holding me close. "Maybe someday we'll go back, Quorra."

"I hope so. The Grid has to be a free system again, not just for us, but for all programs."

"It will be. Never give up hope," he replied optimistically.

I felt him kiss my ear, before he whispered, "I love you, Q." And I knew, one way or another, we would change everything.


	25. Chapter 25

**I do not own Tron or Tron Legacy.**

**Shadow Life : a journal on paper **

**Cycle 25**

"Quorra, I dreamt of Tron again." Flynn had taken a drink of his digitized coffee after he made this statement. Often, he would inform me when he had such dreams, something he initially had to explain to me, since I didn't know what dreams were, never having slept.

"Was it on the old Grid or this one?" I asked. When Flynn told me of the dreams that included Tron, it would vary between Grids.

"The old one. I was a conscript again. Actually Tron and Ram were both in it." He took a bite of his breakfast meat, sausage he had called it.

"Ram. The last time you dreamt of Ram, you woke up yelling his name." I remember running to his room, finding him clutching the sheet, which was tangled around him. As I touched him, he grabbed at me, still not fully awake. He later explained that, in his dream, his friend from the old Grid was being de-rezzed little by little, all the while crying out for Flynn to help him. 'I never felt so helpless, Q. I could do nothing.' he had said.

"This one wasn't a nightmare though." He set down his eating utensil, and entwined his hands as he leaned against the table. "We were on the Grid, Tron, Ram and I. We were looking for something, but every time we took a turn, we'd be right back where we started. Tron was beginning to get frustrated, but we finally sat down, and found glasses of energy in our hands. So we just sat there, talking and drinking, our glasses magically re-filling themselves. We all got drunk, and then couldn't stop laughing. I didn't even know programs could get drunk. Tron said he wished it could always be fun like this, but you know, in reality, Tron always struck me as the serious type. In any case, I woke up really missing the guy. Well, both of them, but mostly Tron."

I didn't know what to say, because I knew Flynn had a great friendship with the security program from his time on the old Grid, when the outdated Master Control Program had sucked him into the system. Flynn had helped Tron defeat the Master Control Program, and since then, Flynn couldn't do without him. He told me he had arranged for Tron to be uploaded onto the new Grid, and together they began work on it. "Well, perhaps it was your mind recalling the better parts of that experience, turning it into something reminiscent of the feelings you had. It's better than some of the nightmares you've experienced."

"True, Quorra. I just wish I wouldn't dream at all. I find it distracting." He began eating, but I could tell his heart wasn't in it.

I knew how Flynn felt, missing the ISOs as I did, and I was grateful I didn't have to dream of them. To have something gone from you, keep coming back would be torture I imagined. How would you ever move past the tragedy if you kept being reminded of it? I rose from my chair, and stood behind Flynn, leaning over his shoulder, my arms enveloping him. "Tron perished doing what he felt was best for the Grid, keeping you alive. He wouldn't have had it any other way, since you said yourself that his concern was for the Grid and the Users, including you. It's too bad you can't program your mind to let these thoughts go so that they don't haunt you anymore."

"Well, Quorra, that is a failing for us Users, not being able to program ourselves. But truthfully, I don't think I'd want to banish Tron, or Ram even, from my mind. If dreams are the only way I can see them, bring it on, man." His hand took mine, and bringing it to his lips, he kissed it. "You should de-rezz these gloves once in a while." He let me kiss his cheek before I went back to my seat.

"Flynn, do you ever miss Clu?"

He gave me a sideways glance, then looked down at his plate. "I don't really miss Clu, the Clu that's out there, terrorizing the Grid. But I admit to wanting things back to the way they were. You'd asked me that, and I do, I do sometimes want it all back again. But it's not going to happen, Quorra. So I don't waste a lot of time wishing for something that's over and done with."

He picked at his food, and finally lay down his fork, no longer interested in eating.

It was so difficult to discuss matters related to the Grid, and not feel sad or worse. I decided then and there, I would only discuss the User world, our games and books. But not the past, the immutable past, the painful past. As Flynn had stated, it was done and over with.

Later on, while I relaxed with one of his books, Flynn lay down to meditate. Shortly after, I heard mumbling coming from Flynn's room. I entered quietly, seeing him tossing about on his bed, and I knew he was having a nightmare. I could hear him call to Sam, and then he awoke with a yell. Flynn saw me standing over him, and sitting up, he grabbed at my hand, pulling me down to sit on the edge beside him. He ran a hand through his hair. "It was my son this time." He closed his eyes, rubbing them as if to will away an unpleasant image. "Lie with me, Q, please. Don't go away just yet."

I nodded, smiling slightly at him. Flynn lay back down, and I lay next to him with my back to him. He pulled me closer, and I felt his warm breath on the back of my neck as he snuggled against me, taking what comfort that he could from my presence. I laced my fingers in his as we rested together. I was curious about what he had dreamt of concerning Sam. It obviously hadn't been a good dream, so I wouldn't ask him about it.

When Flynn's arm tightened around me, my thoughts returned to him. He nestled his body to mine, and whispered, "Thanks, Q. Always there for me," before going quiet, his breath steady. I smiled, and closed my eyes, wondering what it was like to sleep and dream. But maybe I was more happy not to have to know the answer.

**A/N: to any readers of this fiction who also read Ultimate Ally, I am working on the next chapter. It's more difficult because there are more characters and plot developments, so it takes longer. Don't go away, I will be posting another chapter soon. Thanks for your continued support.**


	26. Chapter 26

**I do not own Tron or Tron : Legacy.**

**Shadow Life : a journal on paper**

**Cycle 26**

Flynn had decided we would try something different, something fun. I didn't blame him. We were both suffering from stir craziness, I think he called it. Lack of activity and boredom is the major cause of this disease. Flynn suggested we venture somewhere we had not been before, the Sea of Simulation. He worked for quite some time on a vehicle that would carry us. When he finished, he proudly showed me the finished product, something he called a boat.

"What does this boat do?" I asked him, examining the vessel that looked a bit like a solar sailer, only smaller.

"We sit in it as it floats on the Sea. Back home, humans use boats to cross the oceans, or fish on rivers and lakes. It keeps you from getting wet, Q, as you move on the water, or whatever that stuff is." He beamed at his latest invention as he draped an arm around my shoulders.

"Is it safe?" I asked. I had never been ON the Sea of Simulation. Programs didn't swim, something Flynn had told me about. Humans loved splashing around in water, but for me, dipping my bare hand into the pool on the patio was as close as I had come to swimming.

"Of course, it's safe, Quorra. The sail is a fake, though," he said, as he ran a hand along the edging. "Since there is no wind generated by the Sea, I had to create a different energy source, a small engine similar to the one in light cycles. But I like the sail. Makes it look cool, don't you think?"

"Yes, it does look...cool," I said, not wholly sure if sailing on the Sea was comparable to using a solar sailer. I had flown across the Grid on one of those several times, but this... I sighed, but smiled at Flynn, delighted that he seemed happy.

He reduced the craft into a single data cube, and tucked it into his pocket. I watched as he packed us a pic-nic, all the while a sound emitting from his mouth. I looked in awe as he produced a high pitch sound just by moving his lips.

He noticed me staring at him. "What is it, Quorra?" he asked me.

"That sound you're making." I looked more closely at his face, the sound now stopped.

"Oh!" Flynn laughed. "It's called whistling." He demonstrated again, the sound permeating our kitchen.

I placed a hand to one ear. "It's loud." I attempted to create the sound, but without luck. "Must be a User thing," I said, disappointed.

Flynn tried to show me that by setting my lips just right, I should be able to produce the sound as well. I tried and failed more than once, until I decided I wasn't able to whistle because it wasn't a weapon, thus it wasn't in my new upgrade. Laughing, Flynn hugged me, then went back to packing our meal.

We drove the runner down to a smoothed area, where Flynn used the data cube to rezz our boat. It floated in the Sea, bobbing about in the liquid, while he loaded our supplies, then helped me climb in. I took a seat and waited while Flynn climbed in. "Ready, Q?"

"As ever," I replied, clutching the side of the boat. The power source Flynn had created pushed us off from the shoreline, and we slowly moved away from the hard data, a breeze created by our movement blowing my hair in my eyes. I couldn't help but laugh as I tried to set it right, only to have it blow awry. I had to admit, this was fun. Bolts of light flashed overhead, illuminating the Sea beneath. I dipped my hand into the fluid, but unlike with true energy, I felt no tingle of power as I touched the Sea.

Flynn began to sing, something I had heard him do before. "Row row row your boat, gently down the stream. Merrily merrily merrily merrily, life is but a dream."

I frowned as I listened to the words of his song.

"Was I that bad, Q?" he asked me. Concerning his singing, I had no comparison. But I wanted to know what the song was about.

"What do the words mean, Flynn? Life is but a dream?"

"You might find some information in a couple of the books. To humans, life is reality, but thinkers suppose that life is unreal, while reality is something we have no clear concept of. Sometimes it feels that way in here, like all of this is just a dream."

"Or a nightmare?" I offered.

He chuckled. "Yeah, like that." He placed his hand on the wall next to him, activating the small engine that took us sailing across the liquid Sea. After a few moments, I found that I was enjoying the boat. I whispered to myself, the words Flynn had sung. "Row row row your boat..."

Flynn continued for me, "...gently down the stream..."

Then we both finished together, "...merrily merrily merrily merrily, life is but a dream." It was a moment of pure joy for us, where nothing sad or frustrating could touch us. Flynn came to sit by me, grabbing the basket and showing me what we had to choose from for snacks. He had digitized sandwiches and fruit, with cream tarts for dessert. From here, we could see off in the distance, the city lights lending a dull glow to the horizon.

"What was the old grid like, Flynn?" I asked, leaning back, sated from my tasty meal.

"It wasn't as detailed as this one. Very much the 16-bit world, just like one of the video games I used to play. No commerce, no weather, no city really. That's why when I created the new Grid, I wanted it to be a place that programs and Users could work together. That meant having a place Users could relate to. I was hoping to bring in others."

"It would have been something, having Users on the Grid all the time." I imagined meeting Users from all over Flynn's world. Programs would have had much to learn from them, but that was all lost now. Suddenly, the boat began to rock erratically from side to side. "Flynn, what is it?"

By the look on his face, he didn't know either. "Q, stay here." He moved toward the front of the boat, trying not to fall as the we were rocked vigarously. Then it stopped as suddenly as it had started.

I scanned the Sea, which had only small waves, but a bit off to the right of us, something moved in the dark liquid. "Can we go back now?" I asked.

Flynn saw it too. "Yeah, I think it's about time we went back, Quorra. Hang on, and keep an eye out for whatever that is." He headed the front of the boat back to shore as fast as the engine was capable.

"Flynn, it's following us." Our eyes moved simultaneously to the something in the Sea that was gaining on us. Then the seat beneath me wasn't beneath me anymore, as I found myself flailing in the wet warmth that was the Sea of Simulation.

**To be continued...**

**A/N: ok, Shadow Life is taking a mini break until I get more chapters done for Ultimate Ally. Been so busy, I could only concentrate on the easier of the two stories. Hope you like the cliffhanger! ;-)**


	27. Chapter 27

**I do not own Tron or Tron :Legacy.**

**Shadow Life : a journal on paper**

**Cycle 27**

"Quorra..."

"**Quorra!**"

"**Quorra, grab my hand!**"

I heard Flynn's voice, but couldn't see him. I felt myself sinking beneath the surface of the Sea liquid. Unable to swim, it was difficult for me to stay afloat as I flailed frantically. Where was Flynn? As I sank beneath the waves once more, I felt a hand grab my wrist.

"Quorra, I have you. Now kick, kick hard!"

I reached out into the darkness, feeling myself being pulled forward. I hit something hard, and realized it was Flynn's boat. "Flynn...help me..." Something grabbed my foot, and I was tugged from below. I closed my mouth as I went under, not wanting to swallow any of the Sea's fluid. It had been poisoned so many cycles ago by Clu in an effort to keep any more ISOs from forming. What if the poison remained? What would it do to me? Frightened, I kicked hard at what had my foot, and managed to rise to the surface. Flynn grabbed me again, pulling as hard as he could as I continued kicking at whatever was under me.

"I've gotcha," he said, bringing me into the boat. He did a quick lookover, and seeing I was undamaged, he sat and headed the boat toward shore.

I looked up, noticing the look on his face. I turned to see my mystery assailant coming right for us. Impossibly, it looked like a gridbug, but larger, black and able to swim. This was no small, green, stinging gridbug, but an upgraded version. "Gridbugs can swim, and we can't?" I asked indignantly, meaning programs, of course.

Flynn shrugged ashamedly. "Quorra, when we reach the shoreline, be ready to head for the runner."

I nodded, pushing myself up on one elbow. We weren't far now, and by the look of it, that gridbug would have no problem chasing us down once we reached solid ground. I sat poised to move, my disk now in my hand.

Flynn was half standing, as he edged the boat to some data outcropping. "Get ready, Q. We'll have to leave this here for now."

"I'm ready, Flynn. Just get me on shore. I'll take it from there. You head for the runner and get it started. I won't be far behind." I saw him smile at me and wink. He knew I was prepared to fight whatever it was following us.

Once the boat hit the data, stopping suddenly, Flynn hopped out with me crossing the space in a few steps. I turned, seeing Flynn jump over the craggy data, heading for the runner. As I feared, the gridbug was not deterred by the shoreline, and seeing me waiting, it came right for me. I bent my knees and swung my disk at it, taking a nice chuck out of its body armor, but it kept coming.

Trailing pixels from its wound, its spindly legs nimbly navigated the data chunks. It sensed me, and seemed to hunker down as if it was going to jump. That was just what it had planned, as it sprung at me, legs waving.

I jumped aside, just as I heard Flynn call out my name. The gridbug heard him too, and headed in his direction. I sprang from one piece of data to another, yelling at Flynn to get into the runner. Stopping, I threw my disk at the gridbug, taking several of its legs off, causing it to lose its balance. As it struggled to right itself, I aimed my disk for its body. I hit it hard, but still it didn't stop. As much as I hated having to do this, I had to get closer.

Flynn had the runner going, but I wanted to de-rezz the gridbug, or it would just follow us. Once I was as close as I dared get, I pulled back my arm and aimed for its head. At least, I hoped it was its head. Throwing the disk, the gridbug turned as it left my hand, and hopped the small gap between us. My weapon missed. I stood there, unarmed, waiting for my disk to return to me. Just as the gridbug leapt into the air, my disk was in my hand, and instantly airborne. It hit the gridbug at the juncture of its body and head, severing the latter. The body fell on me, knocking me down and covering me in pixels.

"Quorra!" Flynn had exited the runner and climbed down towards me. He lifted me up, as the remaining pixels faded into nothingness. "Are you alright?" he asked, inspecting me, making sure I hadn't been bitten, shocked, or otherwise damaged.

"Yes, I'm alright. Those combat improvements were very timely," I said, laughing breathlessly. I replaced my disk, and turned to Flynn. "I was in the Sea. Do you think I was poisoned?"

Flynn took my arm, and led me to the runner. "Let's get home, and I'll check you out more thoroughly." The entire drive home, Flynn would glance at me as if he were expecting me to blow up any moment. Inside, I was scared, but I refused to show it. Between the Abraxas virus, Clu poisoning the Sea of Simulation and then destroying our city, my people had no chance for survival. I was the last of my kind as far as we knew, and if a simple outing together was to result in my end, I knew Flynn would blame himself. Yet he would bear the brunt of this error. Without me, he would be alone, parted from his creations and in total solitude.

Once we reached home, Flynn sat me down and removing my disk, looked over my code. "Nothing seems to be altered or deleted. It looks normal, Q." He replaced the disk, and kneeling in front of me, he placed his hands on either side of my face and asked, "How do you feel?"

I peered into his blue eyes, and noted the look of worry. I leaned forward and kissed him. "I feel fine, Flynn. I do," I said, nodding. He hugged me, as I let me head rest on his shoulder. "I don't think we should go sailing on your boat anymore though."

He chuckled, hugging me tighter. "You're right. There are things out here we don't know about yet. I won't risk losing you again."

I was happy I'd had the fighting upgrade done, as it had come in handy. I was also pleased that the Sea was not poisonous to me, even if no more ISOs would manifest from it. Flynn and I, no matter the obstacle, still had each other. And I wondered if Clu was so lucky. We were exiled here in the Outlands, while he controlled the city. Was he as happy as we were? I hoped not.

**A/N: ok, so no mini break. Trying to keep pace with three stories. Ah, the life of the unpaid writer.** **Thanks for reading, and as always, comments are eaten with a glass of milk.**


	28. Chapter 28

**I do not own Tron or Tron : Legacy.**

**Shadow Life : a journal on paper**

**Cycle 28**

Flynn was less than happy with the discovery of a gridbug, nothing like he'd ever seen before. He tried taking samples of the Sea liquid, studying it in minute detail. I could tell he was glad to have something that kept him busy. He would explain his findings to me, and I would smile. But truthfully, the Sea was a mystery to me. It may have been the place of my creation, but I knew so little about it.

"I wish I had comparative information. I'm finding nothing unusual, but then it's not like I ever studied the Sea under a microscope before Clu poisoned it. Gridbugs were pretty standard on the old system, and there have been a few manifest here, but that thing that chased us was no ordinary bug."

"That's for sure!" I agreed. Gridbugs were small, and their bite could pack an electrical punch. But it would take hundreds to de-rezz anyone. That one bug was enough to take me down. "If that is a recent evolution, do you think anything else might show up at our doorstep?"

"The force field should take care of any intruders, but it does make going out questionable."

"We won't be able to go out anymore?" I asked him. I loved getting away when I felt closed in, and driving the runner around was my favorite activity.

"Hopefully, it won't come to that, Quorra. Except for the ISOs, nothing that wasn't specifically created has spontaneously appeared, until now." He peered at a container he had filled with Sea fluids. "I think I want to go get some more. I want you to keep watch, Q, while I pick up more samples. Let's go."

We drove to a location at the shoreline where the Sea washed up on some smaller data blocks, easily maneuverable for Flynn to climb over. I stood halfway between the runner and Flynn, keeping an eye out for any movement. Waiting, I scanned the fluid Sea and the surrounding landscape, noticing only the clouds floating across the Flynn-created sky. Energy bolts flashed periodically in the distance.

"See anything, Q?" Flynn called out to me.

"Nothing. It's all very quiet," I yelled back at him.

"I'll just be a little longer anyway."

A bolt flashed again. I looked up, startled that it seemed closer. One followed right behind it. "Flynn, is the sky erupting? It seems to be more active than normal."

Flynn stopped what he was doing, and looked up. Another flash illuminated his face, that's how close it was. I saw him stand, put his equipment away, and head back up to me. One after the other, energy flashed closer. "I think we'd better get back."

With Flynn's hand on my back, we rushed toward the runner, taking off just as another bolt crashed at the shoreline. Data flew everywhere, a piece hitting the runner as we sped away.

Now the sky became a chaotic mess of noice and light, bolts hitting the ground around us, some coming too close for comfort. I was born of the Grid, and had spent hundreds of cycles here, yet never had I seen an event like this.

Suddenly, a bolt hit the ground violently, not far from us. I turned the control wheel sharply to the left, trying to avoid the bolt as well as the debris it had kicked up. This was not fun for me.

Flynn must have noticed my fear. He placed a hand on my arm, and I felt his energy flow into me. It soothed me, enough to focus my concentration away from the danger around us.

Soon, we pulled into the entryway, now safe from any more of the energy bolts that continued to rain down on the area. Fortunately, Flynn had built his home into a solid block of data, recessed enough, I hoped, to be free from damage should a bolt hit nearby. We exited the runner, and took the lift upstairs. Once there, we could see out the window, bright flashes criss-crossing the sky.

"Flynn, what's causing this?" I turned to see a frown on his face.

"I don't know, Q," he replied, taking a few steps closer to the window.

I grabbed his arm, saying, "No, Flynn. It's too dangerous!"

"Force shield should keep anything out, even those," he said as he peered outside, transfixed by what he was seeing.

I hoped he was right. Still, I wasn't about to test his belief in the shield's integrity against that much power. "Please, Flynn. Let's wait it out."

He heeded my warning, and stood beside me, an arm draped around my shoulders, pulling me close. We watched together as the sky raged outside. "I wonder if the city is getting it as bad as this," he said, staring off into the distance.

I knew Flynn still felt concern for the city, his creation, with the immense help of Clu and Shaddox. "There's plenty of cover there. Everyone will be alright. If you want to check later, we can..."

Just then, a flash hit the patio, rocking the data cliff our home was a part of, sending some of Flynn's things falling from their places on shelves and tables. Flynn's arms closed around me as I clung to him. "Damn, that was close," he uttered in disbelief. Nothing like this had happened before, and since the Grid wasn't supposed to experience random occurences, Flynn was confused as to was causing this outbreak. He had been completely thrown when the ISOs had appeared, the first random happening, then the giant black gridbug, now this.

The ground shook again, knocking us to our knees. A bolt must have hit somewhere along the cliff face. As we clung together, flashes permeated the sky, forcing me to close my eyes and bury my face in Flynn's shoulder. I felt his hand caress my head, as he whispered, "It's going to be ok, Quorra. We've survived a lot. No storm's going to do us in. I promise."

I should have been stronger, but this was no program I could de-rezz with the flick of my wrist. No disk or light stick would make this noise go away. I wondered what it would look like outside, how much damage this...storm...was doing. As I held on to Flynn, I remembered he was the Creator, and I was safer for that alone. Again, we felt the house tremble, and I lost my balance, pulling Flynn down with me. We lay on the floor, a tangled mess of arms and legs. I opened my eyes in surprise, and found myself looking up into Flynn's blue orbs. In that instant, he smiled. Brushing loose hair from my face, he then kissed me gently. I felt his energy flow into me, removing me from the chaos that raged outside. There was nothing anywhere on the Grid but the Creator and me. The only thing I heard were Flynn's whisperings, the only thing I felt were his hands dancing over my form, giving me his power. I no longer felt afraid. I only wanted to join with the Creator, to share myself with him as he was sharing himself with me. But I didn't know how to even accomplish this. I looked up into his eyes, begging for his help. "Flynn, I want...I don't know...I love you," I suddenly blurted out.

He looked at me, his gaze intense, as if he were trying to read me. Again, he smiled, but this was different. All he said was "Q...", before he kissed me, this time harder, forcing my lips to part. I felt swept up in pure emotion, something not exactly foreign to me, but less familiar. I noticed then, the silence. "Flynn, listen."

He leaned on one elbow, tilting his head, listening. "Yeah, it seems to have stopped, finally." He stood, bringing me up with him. We waited cautiously.

Nothing.

Holding onto my hand, he led me to the window, where we saw only darkness. He laughed, saying, "It's over! And we survived, Quorra." He spun me around, and setting me on my feet, lifted my chin with his hand, asking, "Now, you were saying?"


	29. Chapter 29

**I do not own Tron or Tron : Legacy.**

**Rating alert: sexual congress between User and ISO begins.**

**Shadow Life : a journal on paper**

**Cycle 29**

As Flynn attempted to find the reason for the Grid anomalies, I attempted to discern my feelings for the Creator. I knew I loved him, as he had explained the emotion to be. And I could acknowledge he had similar feelings for me. I watched him as he worked, a look of sheer concentration on his face. I had seen that look many times.

"Quorra, I can find no reason for the appearance of the gridbug or the cause for the storm." He ran both hands through his hair. "If we get another storm, it could be worse than the first one."

I came up behind him, placing my hands on his shoulders. "Maybe it was a one time thing, Flynn. Maybe…nothing else will happen."

He touched one of my hands, giving it a gentle squeeze. "We can hope." Leaning back in his chair, he grabbed the hand and gave it a gentle tug, pulling me onto his lap. Brushing aside my hair, he gazed at me, a slight smile on his face. "Now, Q, what was it you were saying during the storm? You needed my help with something?" Flynn laughed lightly as he pointed out, "You're blushing again." His fingers grazed my cheek.

For some reason, I couldn't look him in the eye, but then I thought, _This is Flynn, the Creator of the Grid. I trust him completely._

"Q, what're you thinking?" He tilted his head, waiting for me to answer.

I took his hand, and placed it on my shoulder. I guided it along a circuit line, watching as the line glowed more brightly. "This is what I want," I said boldly. "It's just that…I don't know…I mean, I read in the books about human love, but I still don't understand it."

Now it was Flynn's turn to blush. He cleared his throat, something I knew he did when he was unable to respond quickly, and wanted to stall. "Have you learned anything then?" Flynn asked, now running his fingertips lazily along my circuits on his own.

As his power flowed into me like a tickle, I wasn't sure what to do. "Flynn, I…"

"Shhh, Quorra," Flynn whispered, brushing a fingertip along my lips. "I know what you want, and I would be more than willing to show you, but I'm not sure you're ready. Or if it would even be wise. We'd be crossing a line we've never even discussed, but it's there."

I was curious as to why he didn't want to share human love with me. What could it possibly entail that he had to consider my feelings or expectations. Maybe it wasn't my feelings, but his own that made him hesitate. "Flynn, if I love you and I tell you so, is that all there is to it?"

"Um, no…..that isn't all there is." He seemed awfully reluctant to elaborate, so I felt I needed to be more forceful.

"Need I remind you, you brought it up when the storm ended, and just now. So you can't very well hold out on me." I leaned forward to kiss his cheek, after which I buried my face in his neck, kissing the sensative area. When I pulled back, I was surprised by the look I saw in his eyes. He was breathing a little harder. "Flynn, are you alright?" I asked, unaware that he was experiencing feelings he had ignored for cycles.

"Quorra, I want you…so badly. I don't want to frighten you though. You're such an innocent when it comes to emotional things. I could let myself go, but I don't want to…oh, man," he interrupted himself, running a hand through his hair.

I touched his face, uncertain as to why he was being so closed off with me. Hadn't we been together for many cycles? Hadn't we been through good and bad experiences…together? I leaned in to press my lips on his, keeping my eyes closed and sensing physically, something in my form that perhaps was pleasure. Being a digitized mass of coding versus a flesh and blood creation meant I would feel sensation differently. Was this what Flynn worried about? I wasn't a human. Because of that, I may never truly know what human love was. The thought of being unable to join with Flynn saddened me.

He sensed the change in me, and placing his hand on my cheek, his thumb forced my face up as he kissed me. His tongue invaded my mouth. Breathless, he broke the kiss, looking me in the eyes. "Q…"

I felt his hand rubbing my back, while the other continued tracing my circuit lines. I enjoyed his hands on me, touching me, bringing a brighter glow to me as he infused my being with his power. I felt want and need, but didn't know what it was that I wanted or needed. Then suddenly, I was on my feet.

Flynn took my hand and led me to his bedroom. Once there, he placed hands on my waist, pulling me to him. I felt his heat pouring into me. Enveloping me in his arms, Flynn kissed me deeply, then ran his lips along my cheek down to my neck.

I felt…it had to be pleasure. There was no other way to explain what my sensories were experiencing. "More," I whispered. "I need more, Flynn." We kissed for awhile, before he reached behind me and removed my identity disk. "What are you…?"

"You want to learn about human love, Q." Touching my disk, he de-rezzed my lightsuit. I stood before him, devoid of clothing. It surprised him I didn't seek to cover myself. "You're not shy, Quorra?"

"Why should I attempt to hide anything from you, Flynn? You're the Creator of the Grid. I trust you." I waited, then felt myself swept up in his arms.

With a grin on his face, he laid me down on his bed. His eyes roamed over me as he said, "You're no Barbie doll, that's for sure."

"What kind of doll?" I asked.

"It means you're beautiful, Quorra." Removing his disk, he de-rezzed his own clothing, standing before me uncovered. I had never seen him this way. I was intrigued by his human body, and wanted to touch it, exploring every part of him. So now I knew the difference between his male body and my female facsimile.

Flynn lay next to me, propping himself on an elbow. He seemed more relaxed than a moment ago. "We're going to take this slowly, Q. I want to let you do what you want to do.

Now I felt breathless, as I reached out to take Flynn's free hand and place it on me. "Touch me," I demanded. I pulled his head down to me so that I could kiss him some more. I found I liked kissing. He cupped his hand over a breast, lighting that area of my form. I smiled, enjoying the new sensations he was giving me.

"If an ISO could be perfect, you're a prime example of that, Q," Flynn said, moving his hand down along my side. It traced along my upper leg, as he continued kissing me. Coming to rest on my abdomen, his mouth encircled my breast, his tongue sending shockwaves into me.

I drank in the energy I felt at every spot where Flynn was in contact with me. Hand, mouth, it all felt wonderful to me. His lips were on mine again, as his hand moved down to the juncture of my legs, probing there gently. So this was what humans did to please one another? Did this lead to joining? I had queries, but didn't feel like interrupting what Flynn was doing to me. What if I didn't react like a human female? Would he be upset with me? Then I ceased thinking, waves of energy flowing into me as he slipped his fingers into the opening between my legs. I had never examined my unclothed form before. Being an ISO, it seemed unnecessary, but as a copy of what a human looked like, it meant having the same parts, and now those parts were of use to me...and Flynn.

"You're so much like a woman, Quorra," he whispered hoarsely. "I was afraid…" He stopped talking as he pressed his body closer to me, touching me again.

I looked at Flynn, as he lay next to me. His body wasn't smooth. Mid-way, he possessed protuberances, one that seemed to lengthen and harden, rising up like a pale, fleshy baton from between his legs. I reached out to touch it, when I heard him gasp.

"Damn, Quorra," he uttered. I moved my hand away, but he took it, showing me what he wanted. "No, don't stop touching me, Q," he said, curling my fingers around him. He showed me how to stroke him, his breath now coming in short gasps.

As we kept caressing each other, I parted my legs to make it easier for him. He propped himself up, moving between them to hover over me.

"When will you show me what humans do, Flynn? I want to be one with you." I held him in my arms, eager to see what joining with the Creator, with Flynn, would be like.

"Now Quorra, if you want me to stop, say so before we start. Because once we've started, I don't know that I could stop."

I wrapped my arms around him. "I don't want you to stop, Flynn. Show me."

He slid his protuberance into my opening, slowly filling me. He waited, looking down at me. "Does that hurt?"

"No," I answered, not sure what he expected. "It feels very nice." To show him, I bucked up against him, forcing him deeper into me.

**A/N: great place to break, huh? Just a heads up to any readers of this and Ultimate Ally, both will be nearing completion. Since this one does fit right in with T:L, and you will see how both fit in with the film when they're done, well, Flynn will not be the most considerate person with people he doesn't even consider people. Not to say he doesn't love Quorra, and anyone else on the Grid, but he still has a different mindset that I felt he had to show, to partly explain how he could get into the mess he's in, in both stories. Thank you for reading both stories! Oh, and the Barbie doll thing I read somewhere. I thought I'd include it to show that as an ISO, Quorra is even more human-like than Flynn expected. As in anatomically correct. ;-)**

**Thanks for reading, and for making comments.**


	30. Chapter 30

**I do not own Tron or Tron : Legacy.**

**Shadow Life : a journal on paper**

**Cycle 30**

I lay beneath Flynn, his face hovering above mine. I smiled slowly as I looked unblinking into his blue eyes. "What do we do now?" I asked, sliding my arms up his back.

He spoke raggedly, seeming to have trouble speaking. "Oh, Quorra, if you only knew..."

"Then show me," I demanded expectantly.

Propping himself on his elbows, Flynn moved away and out of me. When I protested, and clung to him, he chuckled. "No worries, Q." He slid back into me. "This is how it's done. Lie back and enjoy it." He kissed me as he pressed himself into me.

"Flynn…" I tried to tell him what I was feeling, but couldn't articulate it. The power radiated in that spot where we were joined. I found myself bringing my legs up to wrap around his body. I wasn't going to let him pull away again.

"Q, you're holding me too tight. Relax. Just let me show you." At least he seemed to find my naivete amusing. I didn't want to disappoint him.

"I'm sorry," I said, releasing my arms and legs enough for him to move. I sensed what he was going to do, and waited. He pulled away, then slid into me again. Now I understood, holding him with less pressure, closing my eyes as he nuzzled my neck. In my desire to be closer to him, I began to meet his thrusts with upward thrusts of my own. We found a smooth rhythm of motion, as we met and parted. I heard Flynn's breathing in my ear as I kissed his cheek.

To be one with the Creator gave me complete satiation, as my form drew energy from him like none I had taken in before. This was the power of a User. It was like a brilliant light, bringing a glow to my circuitry that filled me with strength. But more than that, it gave me a satisfying feeling to share myself with Flynn. He seemed to be enjoying it as well. Our companionship had been satisfying, but I realized we both wanted more. Now, no more barriers remained between us.

Whispering my name over and over, he pressed himself into me hard, and let out a breath. "Oh, man, Q…" he groaned, resting his forehead against mine.

I felt such an intense rise in power as Flynn experienced obvious pleasure, I thought I would overload. His energy radiated from my middle down into my legs and up into my arms, suffusing my entire form. His pleasure and mine became one, expanding outward before collapsing in on us both. I was truly one with the Creator, in a way no other program would ever experience.

His weight lent a comforting feeling, but soon he moved off me to lie next to me instead, leaving an arm draped across my form. "Quorra, are you ok?"

I could only respond with a satisfied sigh. I turned onto my side, and brushed aside a lock of hair that fell over his face. I leaned closer to kiss his cheek and then his ear. I let him press his lips on mine, sucking my lower lip. His actions were strange but not unwelcome. "It was wonderful, Flynn. I hope we get to do this often. That's alright, isn't it?"

He laughed warmly, as he caressed me. "Quorra, it's been too long since I've loved anyone, or even been with anyone. I think you can expect we'll be doing this, a lot."

"Mmm…good," I smiled at him. "I may not be quite what you're used to, not being human, but I know I love you, Flynn. And I want us to be together in every way possible. I never knew how much until now. You're more than just the Creator to me."

"If we have to spend hundreds of cycles here, just the two of us, I wouldn't be unhappy. I love you, Q, and believe me, that took me by surprise." His hand touched my face, a finger tracing my lips lightly. "You're so beautiful," he whispered, gazing into my eyes.

I smiled broadly, before nestling against him. I had seen another side to the Creator. He was teaching me much about what it meant to be human, what it meant to share oneself with someone in so intimate a manner. I missed my people, and my life with them. But if I had to be the last of my kind, I knew I would never be alone.

Additional update to journal: At the time I wrote this entry, shortly after our first joining, I wasn't looking for any reason to see a future without our life together, bonded as only lovers can be. At that time, I had no idea of what was to come, nor would I have expected it. Little did I know there is something that will come between us. It's more harmful than Clu and his Guard, more dangerous than gridbugs and storms. Time, time is our enemy. If only I had known, I might have been spared the pain that is to come. I'm writing in this journal quickly before Flynn finds out. He always swore he wouldn't read it unless I asked him to. Up to now, I've never hidden anything from him. But what he's planning to do is wrong. I trusted him as I loved him. He says he loves me, but then how could he do this to me. I would try not to hate him, but I won't remember the anger. Why, Flynn, why...


	31. Chapter 31

**I do not own Tron or Tron : Legacy.**

**Shadow Life: a journal on paper**

**Cycle 40**

Our time together spread over hundreds of cycles. Flynn had discovered the cause for the strange happenings with the Sea of Simulation. Within the liquid, he found new coding that had developed, where there had been nothing before. That is, the nothing that had been created by the foul poison Clu had manufactured to kill any chance of more ISOs appearing. Flynn was ecstatic. It seemed that the Sea was healing itself, and from that had come new growth. He postulated that the appearance of gridbugs and storms were not going to be regular happenings, but rather, and this he didn't fully understand, the Sea was "testing it legs". That was the term he used. As he explained it to me, the Sea was like his home, Earth. It formed life, maintained that life on the Grid, and when Clu had tried to destroy it, the Sea had died only briefly. Now, he said, it was recovering. On hearing this, I wondered, would ISOs ever appear again.

After some time had passed, we found that Flynn was right. No more gridbugs appeared, and no storms returned to batter the Outlands. Once, when we went on one of our pic-nics, we found a piece of data that seemed infused with light. Flynn examined it, finding the energy level higher than anything he'd ever seen out here.

"Quorra, this reminds me of that small piece of data I gave you."

"Yes, I remember." I went to my room, and brought back the small glowing chunk.

"Do you know what this means, Q? Someday, the Outlands may have full power, enough to build on. At this rate, it could take hundreds, even thousands, of cycles, but I think it could happen." As he gave me back the data, I smiled, imagining a new city, one not ruled by Clu. Flynn City sounded appropriate to me. And all programs who hated Clu's regime could come live there.

As I articulated my dream, Flynn said, "Nice idea, Quorra. The problem with that is the potential for war."

"War?" I asked. The only "war" I was familiar with was the grid game Disk Wars. And if war was anything like that, I supposed creating a city to rival Tron City would have a certain risk involved. Still, Flynn and I marveled at the possibilities that 'someday' would bring.

Despite our imposed exile, I loved being with Flynn. Since our first joining, that first time he showed me how human love was manifested, I knew nothing would be the same for me. Often, we would lie in bed and talk, nothing more than talk. I learned more about the User world, and the human world in general, not all humans being Users.

Sometimes, we'd sneak into the city, careful not to be noticed in order to avoid anything similar to the earlier incident. I really enjoyed those visits. I had to admit to Flynn that I missed living in the city, but as long as we were not welcome there, nothing would change. Clu was gaining favor with programs everywhere. I had spoken with some who actually hated the Creator. Whatever Clu was doing, it reflected poorly on Flynn.

Filling in our time together meant challenging each other to games, Flynn pretending annoyance whenever he lost. When I lost however, my annoyance wasn't a pretense. I hated losing. But I proved an adept student, learning how to play chess and checkers, and a card game called poker. Flynn said outside, humans used money to play. I had no idea what money was, so Flynn fashioned what he called 'chips' from broken pieces of data.

Flynn and I would often talk about Sam, speculating on his growth and education, family and friends. He wondered if Sam had taken a job with his company ENCOM, having the majority of the stock, whatever that was. And then there was Alan Bradley, the User who wrote Tron, Flynn's friend from the old Grid.

"I wonder if Alan and Lora are watching Sam."

"I'm sure if they are your friends, they must be. How old would Sam be now, Flynn?"

He tried to calculate the answer, but he had been stuck here on the Grid for so long, he'd lost all track of time in his world.

As for us, Flynn had adopted a new regime of meditation more intense than his previous ways. I would occupy myself during these times with reading, or by taking the runner out for drives. Occasionally, I would take the light cycle out, but that happened less frequently.

Still, my favorite times were in bed. And I have to say that Flynn made that a frequent occurrence. He would touch my ISO identifier, tracing the glowing pattern, as he showed me various positions, each unique in its own way. I learned a great deal about human physical pleasure. Flynn later attempted to add a sub-routine to my disk, but he became frustrated, finding my code difficult to alter when there was no previously written code to change. Once he had replaced my disk, I pulled him down on top of me, laughing as I kissed him repeatedly, until finally, he too laughed. What did I need with variation, when just touching the Creator sent my circuits into near overload.

I noticed as time passed, Flynn's hair began to develop strands of another color. "That's just gray hair, Q. When humans age, their hair changes color as the pigment fades away."

"How convenient," I said, thinking human hair a marvelous thing.

"Not convenient," Flynn responded. "Troublesome. It means I'm getting old. I wasn't sure if I would age here on the Grid. I guess I have my answer."

"Old. What does it mean to be old?" I asked.

He got this strange faraway look on his face, similar to when he was calculating some new creation. "Being old means experiencing aches you never had before. It means your skin turning into a roadmap of wrinkles. It means...dying."

I sat up with a start. "Dying? You mean de-rezzing, don't you."

"Eventually, yes," he answered plainly, as he pulled me back down next to him.

I snuggled closer, draping my arm over him. "This is what you meant before, isn't it. How some day, you might not be here anymore." When he didn't respond, I said no more. But I felt his arm tighten around me. He kissed my forehead, whispering, "Let's not think about that right now, Q."

How could I not think about it. A world without Flynn. It was inconceivable, yet a potential fact. I felt a tear slip from my eye, but Flynn brushed it away before it hit the pillow. Then he pressed his lips on mine, parting my mouth with his tongue, and I forgot about time, being old, and dying. I only felt the touch and power of Flynn.

I also noticed another change in Flynn, in the form of extra hair growth on his face, although there wasn't much of it. I touched the hair with tentative fingers.

Flynn smiled as I explored. "It's called a beard, Q." He rubbed his face, as he said, "I thought I'd try something different. Do you like it?"

I studied his visage, and shook my head. "No. I don't like it. It's too...fuzzy."

He laughed, and pulling me to him, rubbed his cheek against mine teasingly. He gazed at me, tilting his head. "Sure you won't get used to it? A lot of human women like beards on men."

"And the others?" I asked, my hands on my hips.

He shrugged. "I guess their men shave them off."

"Well, I'm not a human woman, Flynn, and I don't like it. You can remove it now."

Hugging me, he only said, "Quorra, you're priceless. And I'm not removing it."

As time passed, and we continued living our existence in exile, I saw the differences in Flynn. His hair was still changing color, the gray becoming more pervasive. The feeling of loss reared up within me once more. As happy as I was, I had no idea what was to come in the future. Had I known, I would have railed against the world, time, all of creation itself, if it meant losing Flynn.

**A/N: from now on, the chapters will be labeled further into the future to show time passing for our User and ISO. This doesn't accurately reflect the 1000 cycles that passed in the film storyline. I'm sure a lot happened to Flynn and Quorra in that time.**


	32. Chapter 32

**I do not own Tron or Tron : Legacy.**

**Shadow Life : a journal on paper**

**Cycle 100**

Perhaps it was the time we spent together, but after awhile, I noticed we began to think in sinc. Flynn had no hand in my primary programming, so it seemed strange he should know me as well as he did. Often, our moods and thoughts were so coordinated, we were like one mind. But lately, my mood had begun to change, and he noticed it right away. He would try to keep me occupied in many ways, and even when we joined, I couldn't help but feel a sense of loss, wondering about our future. Sometimes, I would cry for no reason, and nothing Flynn did would comfort me. Other times, all I wanted was to be near him, appreciating the time we had left, as if he were dying in a few cycles. I could no longer control my emotions, and I knew it troubled Flynn. Finally, he sat me down and suggested something that I had never imagined would be his answer to my growing sadness.

"Quorra, you know I love you, don't you?" he asked, bringing me to sit on the couch. He took my hand in his, playing with my fingers as he held it.

I smiled at him, answering simply, "Yes, of course." I instantly wondered what he was talking about. Flynn rarely danced around a topic for discussion. After all the time we'd spent together, it was easier to be honest and up-front with each other.

"It's not the same anymore, no matter how hard we try," he said, his head bowed in thought. Finally, looking up at me, he reached out to brush my cheek. "It's painful for you, Q. I don't want to be responsible for that. I'm afraid it could actually damage you over time."

"I don't understand, Flynn." And I didn't. What was he referring to? Was it my mood? He hated to see me upset about anything, that I knew well. But wasn't I supposed to feel sadness at the thought of his absence? I suppose he didn't want me to spend time thinking about something that was a long time off. And as much as I accepted our lives here, I couldn't help but look forward to what was to come with despair, and yes, fear. He had told me this must be an ISO ability, being able to look ahead and imagine the future, since programs thought more in the moment because of their programming.

As I waited for his response, Flynn seemed to be taking a long time to answer. Suddenly, I was afraid.

"I think you should let me excise your memories, only partially. It's hard for you now, and it's only going to be more difficult later on. I'm not getting any younger."

What was he saying? He wanted to erase my memories? The ones having to do with my emotional attachment to him?

"Quorra, I wish I knew what was going to happen in a 100 cycles, let alone further down the road. But I don't. When I'm gone, I don't want you to mourn me..."

I stopped him by pulling my hand away, saying, "Whether or not I have my memories of you as the Creator, or as the User who loved me, the loss would be the same. How can you be so cruel as to take away what I have with you now! Do humans do that? Do they erase the painful things they experience so they don't have to feel?" I knew by his silence that they didn't.

"Quorra..." He started to speak but couldn't seem to get any words out. Running a hand through his hair as he did when frustrated, Flynn finally said, "You're an ISO, Q. I don't know how such deep negative emotions would affect you. It's not as if your people didn't have emotions, but they were, well, they didn't run as deeply as humans. And to be bombarded with the worst emotion of all...I just don't know what harm it could do to you. If...if I excised only the memories of what you and I have experienced as lovers, I think you'd be better off."

I stood, walking away from him. How could he do this, and not be negatively affected himself. Unless... I turned to him abruptly, crying out, 'You hate me!"

"No, Quorra..."

"Yes! You regret everything beyond your protecting me. You said it yourself when you kissed me for the first time." He was doing this for himself, I knew that now. I started for the patio, desiring only to leave his presence, when he grabbed my wrist and pulled me back down on the couch.

"You're wrong. Q, you're the last of your kind. It's important that I protect you. I'm afraid I'm being selfish for wanting more. Our circumstances are far from normal. This isn't Los Angeles, and we're not some couple who bump into each other every day on the bus. The strong emotions you're feeling are more than I ever expected to see in you. And it's already having a negative affect."

I understood little of what he was talking about, Los Angeles, bus, but he'd always been sincere in wanting to protect me. Still, for what he was suggesting, I hated him. I had never hated the Creator, even when he had fled as my people were being destroyed by Clu. But now, I felt only the desire to be away from him. So why couldn't I just stop loving him instead. Because I was more than a basic. I was an ISO. I couldn't be programmed to stop loving Flynn. He knew that too.

"You're going to make me forget everything, aren't you?" I asked.

"No," he protested. "You'll still have your memories of our time together here. Only the more intimate details will be excised."

"But that's the best part. Joining with you is like...having dessert. We always eat dessert with dinner, Flynn. Would you keep that from me?"

"If it was old and dried up, yes."

"Flynn, you're not old and dried up. To me, you're..."

"It's for the best, Q!" his voice harsher than I think even he had intended. "I will get old, and I will die."

I tried not to show my hurt. He would remember everything, and I would remember nothing that happened prior to our joining. For all I knew, he'd even add fake memories, things that never happened, just to fill in the gaps. "Flynn," I stared at him unblinking. "How will you know that you're taking away only the memories you feel I won't need?"

"There is a small risk, Q. Very slight." Wasn't he feeling any doubt about this?

As I pondered his answer, I wondered, was I just a program to him after all? Was it worth the risk for me to lose what I felt for him rather than just teach me to cope.

"I'll always love you, Quorra. But it won't be in the same way. By necessity, it'll have to be different." He held out his hand. "Give me your disk."

I shook my head slowly as my eyes held his. "Take it. I won't give it to you." I sat still, and closed my eyes. I felt wetness as a tear slid down my cheek. I didn't want to see him do this to me. But I felt it as he removed my disk from my back.

He whispered in my ear before standing, "It's for the best, Q."

I waited for him to-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_

**A/N: So, do you think Flynn was doing the right thing? There are only two more chapters left, the next one from Flynn's POV. Thank you for hanging in there with us.**


	33. Chapter 33

**I do not own Tron or Tron: Legacy.**

**Shadow Life : a journal on paper**

**Kevin Flynn's POV**

I read Quorra's journal. It was the only promise to her I had ever broken. When I gave it to her, I told her it was hers and hers alone, and that I wouldn't read any part of it unless she gave me permission. I guess this makes me a liar. When she was out driving the runner, I found the small book and read it. Maybe I didn't read it cover to cover, but I had read enough to know that I had to do something before our relationship destroyed the last ISO on the Grid. Her odd behavior over the last few cycles made me worry that her unique programming would be damaged by the relationship we'd built.

Her entries were filled with the details of our earlier times together. Then they spoke of her growing affections for me. I had no idea at first what an ISO could feel, if anything. But in time, her feelings mirrored mine, and we became lovers. Each moment was one filled with joy and pleasure. Being with Quorra was fun too! She'd finally become quite proficient at Go. If she lost, she'd pout for awhile before demanding cake, or some other sweet. If she won, she'd throw her arms around me and kiss me repeatedly.

She'd read every book on my shelf, which we would take turns discussing for what I could only assume were hours on end. She wasn't Jordan, but I had never expected her to be anyone except herself. Quorra was one of a kind, literally. But she shared what she was with me. She laughed at my jokes, and comforted me when I was missing about Sam. And she trusted me. Now, I had to break that trust.

I looked in the mirror, examining the aging Kevin Flynn. How long had I been trapped here on the Grid? It felt like an eternity. I reached up to touch my hair, now greying with age. I brushed my hand over the now filled-in beard that she so hated but tolerated for me. That, too, was greying. Quorra's hair, however, was still black as night, her apparent youth unchanging. My fingers traced the newest wrinkles on my face. She would tell me they were a sign of my wisdom. If I was so wise, why was I considering this action.

When I called her over to talk with me, my hands were trembling. These hands that had for cycles, touched hers. These hands that had held, caressed and loved her. I looked down at them as if they were killers. I had no choice. This was the right thing to do. So why were they still trembling?

When I told her what I intended to do, her eyes grew wide. I didn't know if it was shock or fear. I didn't want to frighten her. Then I saw something else in her eyes. I recognized it as something I had seen in Clu's eyes once. The pain of betrayal. For a moment, my courage failed me. Hadn't she always said no matter what happened, she would always remain with me? Hadn't she laughed whenever I complained that I was getting old, and then kiss me until I proved to her and myself, I wasn't? How could I take away everything we'd been to each other? I wanted to change my mind, forget I had even considered this idea. But I couldn't let her go on as she had been.

As I explained my plan, I knew I was hurting her. I could see that in her eyes. As I looked at her, I didn't see just an ISO. I saw a beautiful young woman. I had protected her, taught her, comforted her as I let her comfort me. And I loved her. I was taking away everything I had given her, and I hated myself for it. What she didn't seem to realize was, as she was made to forget, I would no longer have the right to our memories either. I would remember them, of course, but I would have no one to share them with. For Quorra, however, they would no longer exist.

I asked her for her disk, but she refused to give it to me. I saw hate in her eyes for the first time. I felt the glare from her like a stab to the heart. She pulled away from me, almost as if she'd rather be anywhere but with me. I couldn't blame her. I was forcing her to endure the very emotions that I was trying to protect her from.

I wanted to kiss her one more time as the lovers we'd become, but that wouldn't have been fair to either of us. As I removed her disk, she wouldn't look at me, but I saw a tear on her cheek. "It's for the best, Q," I told her. But was it? From now on, Quorra and I would be like mentor and student.

She shut down shortly after I had removed the disk from her back. As I worked on her code, seeking the right area where memories were stored, I wondered how difficult it would be for me to look at her as only my ward, my charge to protect in case we would be able to leave the Grid.

It wasn't the easiest thing to do, but finally, I had extracted recent memory, and replaced it with something less romantic, including the fact that we'd enjoyed sex together. It was hard, but I knew she'd feel much better with that part of her existence gone. Now I would have to see that all had gone as well as I had hoped. I reattached Quorra's disk, and waited for her to re-boot.

While she was doing that, I went to her drawer, and pulled out the small journal. I couldn't have her reading about something that she would have no memory of. I went to my bedroom, and slipped it under my things. That would be my punishment. To know how she felt about me, and that I had hurt her by taking it away.

I went to the kitchen for a glass of liquid energy, and then back to her room to check on her. The re-boot should be just about complete. I sat beside her, and waited. Soon, her eyes opened and she sat up. As she turned to look at me, she smiled.

"How do you feel, Quorra?" I asked, offering her the glass. I watched closely for any signs that the extraction hadn't worked.

"I feel fine, Flynn," she answered, swinging her legs over the edge of the bed. "Why am I in here?"

I clasped her hand, pulling her up, and responded, "You were thinking about reading a book while I meditated. Guess you forgot to bring one from the shelf."

She nodded, and headed out to the main room, me following. "Alright. How long will you be meditating then? Shall I go ahead and start dinner?"

I gazed at Quorra, wishing I had been able to extract the feelings I had for her as easily as I had taken her feelings for me away. That, too, would be my punishment, to always remember. To live with her, and watch her, knowing I could never truly have her.

"I'll be just awhile. Why don't you go ahead and choose something for us, Q. And maybe for dessert, chocolate cake."

**A/N: One more chapter to go.**


	34. Chapter 34

**I do not own Tron or Tron Legacy.**

**Shadow Life : a journal on paper**

**Cycle 1000**

**(Quorra's last narrative, without her journal, which Flynn took)**

I was learning so much from Flynn. And as he shared what his world was like, I hoped that we would be able to travel there sometime. It was a silly hope. The portal could never be opened from the inside. The beam that told us when Flynn was visiting the Grid never lit up in all the 100s of passing cycles, that is, until after nearly 1000 cycles had passed...

I was driving the light runner around the Outlands, Flynn being at his usual pre-meal meditation. I headed for the city to see what was going on there. I would often sneak in, either on-the-sly, as Flynn put it, or incognito with my disk modifications. Mid-way to the city, I saw a magnificent sight. There, beyond the Outlands where the portal was located, the beam appeared, topped by the brightest light visible anywhere. It was as I had remembered, when Flynn would come and go, only this time, it wasn't the Creator who had activated the portal. Then, who was it?

I continued on to the city, and wandering around, listened for any information. Many programs hadn't even noticed the beam, enclosed in the towers, or at ground level where visibility was nil. But soon, I heard rumors being spread around about the presence of a User on the Grid. Was it possible? A User had activated the portal, to do what, free Flynn? I had to get as many details as I could, so that I could inform Flynn of what was happening. He'd want to know if another human was actually on the Grid.

By nature, rumors never reveal the whole truth. I heard that a User had entered the Grid and had attacked Clu. That Clu had killed the User on sight. That the User wanted to create an alliance with Clu. That the User had stumbled upon the Grid, and was being treated like any rogue program, having been sent to the Disk Wars, where Clu discovered him.

Soon, the rumors became more detailed. The User was being placed on the Lightcycle game grid, forced to battle Clu and his team of exemplary riders. If true, there was no hope for him. I had to get there to see if I could somehow help.

As I infiltrated the crowds heading to the arena, I heard disturbing news. The identity of the User had been revealed during the Disk Wars challenge, when he had been pitted against Rinzler, the strongest player on the Grid, and Clu's personal assassin. He had been treated as a rogue program, until he stood and told everyone he wasn't a program at all. Shock reverberated throughout the stands as he declared his name to be Sam Flynn. The same as the Creator's. The son of Flynn. To me, he was just Sam. But it couldn't be, could it?

I went to my favorite hiding spot whenever I watched the Games. It was high atop the sign where combatants names were placed. One by one, as they were de-rezzed, the names would vanish until only one or two remained. This game, Clu's name was lit at the top of his team's list. For Clu to ride against someone, they'd have to be pretty special. It seemed His Excellency wanted to be personally responsible for the death of this combatant. Only one User could ever hope to defeat Clu at this game, and that was Flynn himself.

As I watched, Clu's command ship landed onto the game grid. His aide, Jarvis, exited the ship, and began to give the introductory speech as usual. He verified that yes, we did have a User in our midst. And then I saw him there, standing next to Jarvis and his assistants. It was Sam. He seemed so small from way up here. I had to rescue him from whatever Clu had planned for him, knowing it wasn't going to be good. Leaving my hiding spot, I ran back to the hidden runner, and drove it to a lesser used part of the game grid, far from the noisy crowds. Ripping a hole in the barrier with a small explosive, I took the runner just inside the now damaged area, and waited.

Soon the challenge began, with Clu's team already on the track. Sam and his team rezzed their cycles, and headed in the opposite direction. It wasn't long before programs began dying. Nervousness permeated my being as I watched Flynn's son take on the best of Clu's riders. He was holding his own too, taking out a couple of them easily. Surprisingly, he was able to stay alive as last man standing. But as was expected, Clu remained as well. And he had his eye set on destroying the son of Flynn. I had to move quickly.

Revving the runner as fast as I had ever pushed it, I raced out onto the Grid straight for Sam, just as Clu was also moving towards him. Whoever reached him first, would win. I gunned the runner into a gear I hadn't had to use until now, then as I reached Sam, jammed on the brakes in a screeching, smoke-filled stop. My light ribbon was now between Sam and Clu, who hit the barrier hard, flying off his cycle. I opened the door of the runner to the startled human. Through my helmet, I ordered, "Get in." He only stared at me, until I again ordered him to "Get in!" He did, and I gunned the runner, turning it around to head in the opposite direction.

With Clu's programs behind us, we raced toward the arena wall. Sam Flynn wanted to ask silly questions in the middle of our escape. I had to tell him to hang on, as I tried to rescue us from what would be painful deaths if Clu ever got his hands on us. Evading Clu's riders, including Rinzler, I assumed, we were this close to our goal. I took out a couple of the chasing riders. With the one left, I released explosives into a spot beneath the stands.

Sam Flynn yelled, "Hold up, man, you can't make that!"

Activating the stud tires we would need to drive on the broken up data field that made up the Outlands, once we had cleared the hole, and had landed on the rough terrain, I said assuredly, "Made it." As soon as I knew we were safe from followers, I de-activated my helmet, and introduced myself to the one person I felt I knew only a bit less than the Creator himself.

"I'm Quorra," I said, holding out my hand as Flynn had shown me once as they way humans introduced themselves. Sam Flynn took my hand, and I couldn't believe I was touching the hand of another User, and the boy about whom Flynn had spent so much time talking.

Sam Flynn seemed nervous. Not about my driving, I hoped. Flynn had often ridden with me, but it had taken cycles for him not to cringe as I drove. The Grid would be unknown to this new arrival, so of course, he must be nervous about that. I tried to reassure him by telling him everything was ok.

"Where are you taking me?" he asked.

I replied, "Patience, Sam Flynn. All your questions will be answered soon." I had to laugh as I realized it **was** my driving making him nervous. As I drove onward, I turned to look at the son of Flynn. He was young, and quite attractive, even if he looked nothing like Flynn. I was more curious than I could contain. After so many cycles of hearing stories about Sam, or comforting Flynn when he became depressed about their prolonged separation, here he was, in the flesh so to speak. What would my mentor say when I brought him the one person who was his greatest source of joy, and his greatest source of sorrow.

Soon we reached the safehouse where Flynn and I lived. I couldn't wait to show the Creator our new guest. Flynn would be surprised I was sure. But he would also be happy, I think. Later, we would find out how Sam had arrived here. I couldn't wait to hear his story.

We rode up the lift in silence. When reaching the top, I told Sam to wait, while I informed Flynn of our arrival. As I headed towards him, he in his usual meditation position, had heard me coming, and told me he had dreamed of Tron, his friend from the old grid. Clu had killed Tron as he was protecting his friend, and early on, Flynn would often have dreams about the faithful program who had sacrificed himself for the Creator.

I knelt beside him, saying, "It's a sign."

He laughed ruefully. "A sign, my dear apprentice, of a weary soul. I'm afraid something's happened."

"Something has happened." I placed my hand on his shoulder. "We have a guest." Flynn and his son were finally to be reunited, and I was there to see it.

Finis.

**A/N: There it is, my readers. Of course, we know where it goes from there. Thank you all who followed along with Flynn and Quorra, and especially to those who left comments. Your support inspired me to continue. But now I must go back to my other stories, plus I have a new one almost ready to begin. I hope you follow along with any or all of those as I release them. **

**Again, many thanks to Tron fans everywhere!**


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